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Emily1239

  1. Ineedmakyinme Ineedmakyinme
    posted a quote
    September 27, 2012 3:30pm UTC
    Dear 'boyfriend';
    Application For Permission To Date My Daughter
    Note: Please be prepared to submit additional information e.g. psychological profile, DNA samples and admission to polygraph exam.
    1. Name:______________________________________ Date of Birth __/__/____
    2.Height: __ft__in. Weight: ___Lbs. I.Q: __ GPA: __
    3.Social Security Number: ___-___-____ Drivers License: State: _______ Number: _____________
    4.Home address____________________ City: _____________ State_____
    5: Boy Scout Rank: _________________
    6.How fast can you run 40 yards: ____sec. Two Miles: ___min.
    7.Church you attend: ___________________ How Often? _____________________
    8.In 50 words or less, Explan what "DONT TOUCH MY DAUGHTER" means to you:
    _____________________________________________________________________________________.
    9. In 50 words or less, Explain what "Late" means to you:
    ____________________________________________________________________________________.
    10. Complete the following sentences:
    a) If I were to be shot, the last place I would want to be shot is in the __________.
    b) If I were to be beaten, the last bone I would want to have broken is ___________.
    c) The one thing I hope this Application does not as is________________________________________.
    d) In the unfortunate event of my untimely death, I would like my ashes scattered ___________________.
    e)My greatest fear is____________________________.
    11. What do you want me be if you grow up?_________________________________________.
    12.How you ever been fingerprinted? Yes___ No___
    13. Do you have any identifying marks? e.g. birth marks,scars, tattoos Yes___ No___
    14.My dentist is __________________________________ City:_______________ State:______________
    I hereby swear that all the information supplied above is true and correct to the best of my knowledge under penalty of Deah and or Dismemberment.
    Signed:____________________________________
    Thank you for your interest! Please allow 4-6 years for processing. You will be contacted in writing if you are approved. Please do not call, write or E-mail. Any attempts at contact during the processing of this application could be hazardous to your health and/or cause serious personal injury.
    Sincerely,
    Daddy's Orders

  2. sayheyilyx sayheyilyx
    posted a quote
    August 25, 2012 2:10pm UTC
    How roll call will go in the future:
    Teacher: Welcome to class students! Please say "here" when I call your name.
    Teacher: Albus
    Albus: Here!
    Teacher: Doctor
    Doctor: Oh, yes, uhm, hello. I can't talk at the moment, time's gone wibbly. Probably leave a message at the tone or something.
    Teacher: Uhm... okay? Hermione?
    Hermione: Yes, I'm here! And when's our first test? I've been studying all summer, and-
    Red-headed boy in class: Oh my god, Hermione, shut up!
    Teacher: And you must be Ron! Okay then. Primrose.
    Primrose: Here.
    Random girl in the back of the class: I VOLUNTEER!!
    Teacher: And I see Katniss has made it today, as well. Welcome.
    Blonde boy: Katniss is here?! Yes!! Here, Katniss, try this bread I baked this morning!!
    Brunette boy: Oh you'd better keep your hands off her! She's my best friend! We go hunting together!
    Teacher: Peeta! Gale! Stop fighting over Katniss and sit down!
    Teacher: Rory.
    Doctor: Oh, Rory died yesterday, ma'am. But he should be back again tomorrow.
    Teacher: ....oh...kay? And lastly, Draco.
    Draco: I'm LAST?! My father will hear about this!

  3. cutehanan18 cutehanan18
    posted a quote
    September 10, 2012 6:49pm UTC
    here is a great story.....
    A girl went to a party and
    she ended up staying longer than she
    planned, and had to walk home alone.
    She wasn't afraid
    because it was a small town, and she lived
    only a few blocks away.
    As she walked along under the tall elm
    trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from
    harm and danger.
    When she reached the alley, which was a
    short cut to her house, she decided to take it.
    However, halfway down the alley she
    noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her.
    She became uneasy and began to pray,
    asking for God's protection.
    Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness
    and security wrapped round her, she felt as
    though someone was walking with her.
    when she reached the end of the alley,
    she walked right past the man and arrived
    home safely.
    The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been killed in the same alley just
    twenty minutes after she had been there.
    Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and
    the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep.
    Thanking the Lord for her safety and to
    help this young woman, she decided to go to the
    police station.
    She felt she could recognize the man,
    so she told them her story.
    The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him.
    She agreed and immediately pointed out
    the man she had seen in the alley the night before.
    When the man was told he had been
    identified, he immediately broke down and confessed
    The officer thanked Diane for her bravery
    and asked if there was anything they could do
    for her She asked if they would ask the man one question.
    Diane was curious as to why he had not
    attacked her When the policeman asked him, he answered, Because she wasn't alone.
    She had two tall men walking on either side of her.
    Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone.
    Did you know that 97% of teenagers will not stand up for God?
    Fav. this if you truly
    believe in God
    PS: God is always there in your heart and loves you no matter what
    "If you deny me in front of your friends, I shall deny you in front of my Father"
    stand up for Him. 51% won't fav this
    nmq

  4. jimmy365 jimmy365
    posted a quote
    September 17, 2012 4:20pm UTC
    How I got out of doing the dishes My mom: Do the dishes
    Me: *places sock on counter*
    My mom: What's this? Why is it here? *hands me the sock*
    Me: MASTER HAS GIVEN DOBBY A SOCK!
    My mom: wait what?
    Me: DOBBY IS A FREE ELF
    Me: *runs to room*
    nmq

  5. yourcool yourcool
    posted a quote
    June 18, 2013 5:57pm UTC
    "i need to stop," i whisper
    as i clicked next episode.

  6. Hale_Storm18 Hale_Storm18
    posted a quote
    May 26, 2013 3:00pm UTC
    "I think I missed out on the “neat and cute handwriting” gene that every girl seems to have and this is unfair"
    Intelligent people have messier handwriting because they think fast. When you think and process things faster, you can also write quicker, but it’s going to be sloppy. People with neat writing are usually (no offense) not as smart. So, I embrace my sh.tty writing.


  7. posted a quote
    January 1, 1970 12:00am UTC
    This quote does not exist.

  8. dolph* dolph*
    posted a quote
    April 20, 2013 12:09pm UTC
    I've been whomping my willow thinking about you

  9. dolph* dolph*
    posted a quote
    April 20, 2013 12:13pm UTC
    I like all Harry Potter puns, whether they're Sirius or just plain Riddikulus

  10. Delicate* Delicate*
    posted a quote
    March 29, 2013 7:14pm UTC
    Home.
    The feeling of the sheets beneath you and the blankets above you in the morning as you wake, coccooned in warmth. The sight of rain drizzling down and the memory of a world coated in ice. The crackling of a fire, it's splendid warmth. The scent of wood, the feel of it's bark. Laughter at night as the mosquitoes bite. Sun tan oil and fresh cut grass. Mowing the lawn. Sunbathing. Fourth of July with the family. Reading as sunlight hits your skin through the window. Jumping into the lake. Getting teased by the guy you've known since you were a child. Lying in the grass, relaxing under a tree, protected by shade or not at all. Those moments between waking up and being asleep. The scent of cherry blossoms. Coming in from a chilly winter night. Hot cocoa or a steamy cup of tea.
    Home.


  11. posted a quote
    January 1, 1970 12:00am UTC
    This quote does not exist.

  12. kristabff kristabff
    posted a quote
    March 27, 2013 4:37pm UTC
    In a resteraunt.
    When I was 8 years old: ~eats chicken fingers~
    ~ignores napkin and uses lap as human napkin~
    Now as a teen: ~still eats chicken fingers~
    ~still ignores napkin and uses lap as human napkin~

  13. iluvmusic_05 iluvmusic_05
    posted a quote
    April 28, 2012 1:02pm UTC
    In the winter: omg its 55 degrees time to break out flip flops and shorts
    In the summer: omg its 55 degrees time to break out north faces and uggs

  14. lovestardoll423 lovestardoll423
    posted a quote
    May 7, 2012 9:10pm UTC
    nmf.
    I've always wanted
    A cute neighbor.

  15. _to_the_kids_who _to_the_kids_who
    posted a quote
    April 14, 2012 12:50pm UTC
    Here's to the kids who
    haven't had their first kiss yet.
    /♥/

  16. jimmy365 jimmy365
    posted a quote
    June 27, 2012 4:33pm UTC
    Below is a list of all those who have a crush on me:
    format by jimmy365

  17. mlsunny mlsunny
    posted a quote
    March 27, 2012 6:11pm UTC
    36 Reasons Why It's Good To Be A Girl:
     
    1. We can wear guy clothes. If they wear ours, they get funny looks.
    2. Our friends don't say hello to us by punching us on the arm.
    3. Yea- PMS sucks. But at least we have a good excuse to chow down on chocolate for a week.
    4. If we're on a really big ship that happens to hit an iceberg, we'll probably get first dibs on a lifeboat.
    5. Girl talk. You know, how we just understand each other without having to explain stuff.
    6. We never have to stand at a urinal and have other girls stare at us.
    7. Dark circles under the eyes? We can just cover them up with a little concealer.
    8. We don’t have to shave our faces.
    9. We can jump around a lot and shake our hair and it looks like we know how to dance.
    10. We get yummy chocolates and flowers from guys.
    11. We don’t have to dowse our food in Tabasco sauce just to look tough
    12. When we get married we get to keep our own name or choose one that we like even better.
    13. At least one girl always survives in horror flicks.
    14. We can take stuffed animals to bed no matter how old we are.
    15. We don’t have to wear tuxedos to the prom.
    16. Nose hair, ear hair, back hair- so not a problem for us.
    17. SLUMBER PARTIES! Guys just don't know how much fun those are.
    18. We don’t have to worry about getting hurt, um, down there.
    19. That special bond we have with our moms-someday
    20.We don’t feel the need to slap our teammates butt when she makes a good play.
    21. Pick up lines. They're not something we need to practice.
    22. We can get away with wearing platform shoes without looking goofy.
    23. We give really good advice
    24.On TV shows we're always the ones that have coolest supernatural powers.
    25. We can put cotton balls between our toes, paint our nails, and not feel the least bit silly.
    26. The coolest, sweetest songs and poems have been written about us.
    27. We don’t have to sit on our wallets.
    28. And our wallets have a place for change.
    29. Our lives do not revolve around ESPN Sports Center
    30.We can wear dresses without getting really weird looks from people
    31. We are called tomboys, Boys are called girlie.
    32. We have nicer handwriting than guys. Well it’s true.
    33. Our magazines have Horoscopes.
    34. We don’t have to stuff boxers in our jeans.
    35. Female pro athletes aren’t overpaid egomaniacs.
    36. Girls with guy first names (like Alex) sound cool, but it doesn’t work the other way around.
     

  18. barakat* barakat*
    posted a quote
    March 20, 2013 7:32pm UTC
    life is like a tennis match;
    sometimes, you should meet the ball,
    the problem, head on,
    but sometimes,
    you should let it slow done and come to you.
    you never know what you should do until the time comes,
    because, just like in that tennis match,
    it's simply a matter of judgement.


  19. posted a quote
    January 1, 1970 12:00am UTC
    This quote does not exist.

  20. Travis Allred* Travis Allred*
    posted a quote
    March 18, 2013 8:44pm UTC
    Why Complicated Life?
    Missing somebody? ...Call
    Wanna meet up? ...Invite
    Wanna be understood? ...Explain
    Have questions? ...Ask
    Dont like it? ...Say it
    Like something? ...State it
    Want something? ...Ask for it
    Love someone? ...Tell it
    We just have one life
    Keep it simple.

:)

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