Vent
*this is how I remeber
it*
So a few months ago I formed this
"clique" with these girls that I had been close with
for most of my life. We were like joined at the hip.
One of the girls was "kicked" out, unoffically.
I however continued to talk to her on the side after a
while. The rest of the group wasn't that fond of my
relationship with her. They all thought that I was like a
secret spy, taking their private info and passing it to her... I
wasn't. A few weeks after this girl left I started to
feel excluded from the rest... not included in secrets or
convorsations....One of the girls imperticular. She claimed
that she was never mean and told me I should "stop trying to
get attention". Then she left just like that without
giving me a chance to process the sentance till she had already
left. The next day we had a long period cause of exams so
all 6 of us played tennis 3 on 3. The girl who I was most
upset with was on my team...she spent the WHOLE HOUR telling me
that we couldnt be friends anymore and that she doesnt like me
and that she doesn't want me to go home and cry and
stuff...lets just say...I did the exact oppisate... I stopped
caring about my grades, my family, I would've stopped caring
about my friends but I had isolated my self from the rest of my
old friends. I wanted to die. I hated my self.
I piled on the make-up to change my face determined that my
physical apperance was part of why everyone hated me... I stopped
eating for a while...I didn't care about anything. I
gave up on life. Then after about 2 months of pure
suffering, my parents found out and got me help...it doesnt
really serve a puropse other than a person to vent to... I have
high depression and anxiety...because of that f*cking exam tennis
game...I have a phobia of being left ,again, the majority
of my relationships with all of them as been mended but nothing
between us will ever be the same...I swear no one will read this
but If you do than thank you<3 it feels good to get it
out.
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xoxohaileyxoxo · 1 decade ago
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we dont really know each other but if you ever need anyone to talk to, ill be here