101 Ways To Annoy
People 1. Sing the Batman theme
incessantly.
2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual
massage."
3. Specify that your drive-through order is "to
go."
4. Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in
public consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeep
Bip..."
5. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen
while talking to others.
6. Amuse yourself for endless hours by hooking a camcorder to
your TV and then pointing it at the screen. <
7. Speak only in a "robot" voice.
8. Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly.
9. Start each meal by conspicuously licking all your food, and
announce that this is so no one will "swipe your
grub".
10. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17
inch paper, 98 copies.
11. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.
12. Sniffle incessantly.
13. Leave your turn signal on for fifty miles.
14. Name your dog "Dog."
15. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all
weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."
16. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what
YOU think."
17. Claim that you must always wear a bicycle helmet as part of
your "astronaut training."
18. Declare your apartment an independent nation, and sue your
neighbors upstairs for "violating your airspace".
19. Forget the punchline to a long joke, but assure the listener
it was a "real hoot."
20. Follow a few paces behind someone, spraying everything they
touch with Lysol.
21. Practice making fax and modem noises.
22. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and
"cc:" them to your boss.
23. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.
24. Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if
people play along to avoid the appearance of ignorance.
25. Erect an elaborate network of ropes in your backyard, and
tell the neighbors you are a "spider person."
26. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance
with the prophesy."
27. Wear a special hip holster for your
remote control.
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jojogotsome · 1 decade ago
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got cut off