Do I fool you? You think
I'm happy. You ask how
I am & my response is
"I'm fine." Wanna know the
the truth? I'm not fine.
I'm broken inside. Someone
asked me the other day
"what do you live for?" I
realized: I honestly don't
even know an answer to
that question. I pondered
on it for a while and came
up with nothing. I'm not
one to cut. I don't care to
control my pain... I want
to get rid of it. There's
days I just want to curl up
in a ball and forget the world.
Just for a day. I know it
would be 1,000 times more
peaceful than waking up in the
morning & facing the day and
all the people the day brings.
I don't want to kill myself. I
considered that a few years
back, and now I think I was
dumb for even considering that.
Most of my life is good.
But the few bad things eat
away at me. {sorry... just venting}