FAKE FRiENDS: Never ask for food.
REAl FRiENDS: are the reason you have no food.

FAKE FRiENDS: Call your parents Mr/Mrs
REAl FRiENDS: Call your parents DAD/MOM

FAKE FRiENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back.
REAl FRiENDS: keep your stuff so long they forget its yours.

FAKE FRiENDS: know a few things about you.
REAl FRiENDS: Could write a book about you with direct quotes from you.

FAKE FRiENDS: Would knock on your front door.
REAl FRiENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME!"

FAKE FRiENDS: will talk crap to the person who talks crap about you.
REAl FRiENDS: Will knock them the out