I dread texting you back and meeting up. What sort of friendship is this? I comfort myself with the thought that it'll be over in five years. If I won't worry about it in five years, I don't need to worry about it now. There, I'll let out the sigh I didn't realise I was holding. In the same way I'll let go of your hand. There, it'll be that simple.
It always comes out of nowhere. am i really the type to be touched so easily? it wasn't much. i know that far. we met at our bus stop, but i seem to have already taken a liking to you. why am i like this...i guess i just like having crushes. after 2 years in the same course, you introduced yourself for the first time after an exam. i normally don't like small talk, but it came easily to me then. you complimented me, looked up my bus route for me, and assured me that i'll do fine. our meeting came out of nowhere, but it was a welcome surprise. I was supposed to see you the same time a few days after, i was worried you would leave first. But there you were, but i don't know what it was. I was just too afraid to approach first. You looked busy on your phone, and i didn't want to interrupt. i also didn't want you getting the wrong idea and there were too many people around. yeah, i came up with a million excuses to not walk over and say hi. It's frustrating for me too, but i'm always like this. i just hope my first impression sticks and you don't think i'm cold.
Midwest Gothic abandon farms silos that are slowly turning back into the earth street lights that flicker as you pass them empty streets in the middle of the night, but you still hear footsteps behind you someone looking at you from a curtained window, then you blink and they’re gone storm sirens at 2 AM an old radio carackling on, even though no one touched it the endless fields know your fears
East Coast Gothic foggy piers something large and unknown washing up onto the shore the end of the beach disappearing into the storm shade of the forest, leaving patterned shadows and tricking your eyes overgrown tombstones old houses painted black, shuttered windows an outbuilding in the middle of the woods, the forest has moved inside you know someone lives there figures between the trees, whispering
One&Only❤️🏒 2:09 AM 11/12/18 okay where do i start... uhh i love you so much (my full name) you are my everything my whole world. I know we've had our ups and downs kinda like were on a roller coaster but im so set to keep riding it with you because i want u to be in my future and yea ik you probably reading that is scaring you and trust me it scares me too because the thought of ever losing you would mean im losing my everything. Yea this is cheesy as hell but im a pretty cheesy guy🧀 I almost lost you once and that was probably the worst decision in my entire life because i actually thought i lost you forever and that you would never give me a second chance. I know i've made you feel horrible and feel like your not worth anything and it kills me every time i think about it because hurting you or making you feel horrible about yourself is the last thing i would ever wanna do. You make my heart skip a beat whenever im talking to you even if im mad i cant stay mad at you forever. Reading the stuff you write makes me realize how much I've put you through for example your poem i felt the pain and the way you felt in that moment and i probably didn't even realize it at the time in August but i realize it now. I should of stopped making you feel those ways a long time ago but yknow i am a horrible boyfriend so i guess thats where that comes into play. Anyways enough sad and dark side of me. I do not know how many times I have to tell you I love you for you to remember that im actually your boyfriend or to think I actually do love you. Because I DO LOVE YOU SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MUCHHHHHHHHHHHHHH TO MARS AND BACK hehe wow im good. Anyways this whole paragraph is probably unnecessary but i had to distract myself and uhh and idk if ive sent you this poem but here it goes.... Tu sais que tu es amoureux Quand tu ne peux pas t'endormir Parce que la réalité est enfin meilleure Que vos rêves Pour nous deux La maison n'est pas un lieu Mais une personne Et nous sommes enfin à la maison La distance n'est qu'un test Pour voir jusqu'où l'amour peut voyager Distance signifie si peu Quand quelqu'un a tant à dire Je t'aimerai plus que moi Et plus qu'hier Je voudrais pouvoir passer toute ma vie Vous dire combien je vous aime Its french but im sure u can figure it out through google translate. Also ig this is my creative side🤷🏻♂️ I love you and our future fam jam👩🏻🧔🏻🧑🏻👧🏻👧🏻🤪💚💚💚❤️ Me 6:14 AM 11/12/18 1. I didn't wake up last night 2. you're better now, yeah?...3. i said i'd be back, didn't i? 4. Don't pay any mind to the worthless thing or me feeling horrible about myself, its either insecurities, negative thoughts, or whatever else but your fault. 5. I'm still with you, aren't i? I kind of know when's a good time to leave even though it may hurt the other, but there's no time with you. I don't need that time. I know it'll get better at some point, i just gotta wait it out. 6. YOURE NOT A HORRIBLE BOYFRIEND. I just let my thoughts get the best of me. 7. I don't mean to..sometimes forget that you're just another person i'm talking to. If i'm being honest, i sometimes surprise myself when i'm talking to you or thinking about you and think to myself "I wish he'd ask me out already" THATS WHEN I REMEMBER and feel stupid. I still think that there could be someone else and you didn't ask me for that reason. You tell me someone likes you, and i'm gonna jump and say go for her if you like her back. if you don't, see where things go. I'll only do that because i've done so many times for 2 years for someone else. I'd even ask him "what do you think of (blank)?" and he'll get annoyed because even though i mentally knew, it seemed like i was trying to get rid of him, but i wasn't. It wasn't even a test. I couldn't believe he was with me...but we broke up a lot during those 2 years. I was still his friend, and he was my best friend. When we were friends, he'd tell me he likes someone or someone likes him, and i'd try to help him with the girl. Bad habits stayed with me i guess...i'm sorry. 8. Honestly, i don't know how many times either because ^^ 9. i love you too. I can't say to Mars because if we think of the convo again, i seem to really want to stay on earth, but i'll go anywhere you want me to go, whether it's with you or away..10. It seemed familiar, but i love you so freaking much...i'm home? 11. ITS SO ADORABLE, I LOVE ITT💚❤❤💚💚❤ 😭 i want things to go our way so bad for our future to happen
11/9/18 // 11/11/18 12:21am I hope to God youre okay. Im sorry I couldnt talk to you more than i wish I did. I love you so much and I wish only the best. You dont deserve to go through this. None of this. No one deserves to, but you the most to me. I love you so much, stay strong..Please. 💟 We spoke about this one specific heart and it’s meaning. My love for you will always be cloaked from others. No one can touch it, but I. Stay Strong Jay 💟❣️
You broke me , then fixed me. Now the pieces of me hold together, forever, in your hands. I had always felt a void in my heart and soul after that day, even years afterward. It was heart-wrenching. Now I know why; I was right. You were the one. We were soulmates when I didn't even believe in fate; you came back to me years after we should have forgotten each other. It was hard to trust each other at first, but we have come a long way; I've always wanted to marry my best friend. It's been two and a half years now since we came back together. I now know I will ever have to endure the pain of losing you again. I have never been happier in my life. I love you so much, Daniel.