Only In
America
can a
pizza get to your house faster than
an ambulance. are there handicap
parking places in front of a skating
rink.do drugstores make the sick walk
all the way to the back of the store
to get their prescriptions while healthy
people can buy cigarettes at the front.
do people order double cheese burgers, large
fries, and a diet coke.do banks leave
both doors open and then chain the pens
to the counters. do we leave cars worth
thousands of dollars in the driveway
and put our useless junk in the garage.
do we use answering machines to screen
calls and then have call waiting so we won't
miss a call from someone we didn't want
to talk to in the first place.do we buy hot
dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages
of eight.do we use the word 'politics' to
describe the process so well: 'Poli' in
Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning
'bloodsucking creatures'. do they have drive-up
ATM machines with Braille lettering
