Witty Profiles

menu
sign in or join

xdamxselxhappy witty anniversary!

Status:

Member Since: 27 Apr 2010 07:17pm

Last Seen: 27 Aug 2012 06:27pm

user id: 107402

45 Quotes
248 Favorites
0 Following
2 Followers
Comment Points
Comments
Comments on Quotes
Comments by User
Quote Comments by User
Flair beta

follow block report

                                                                 And Im Just Waiting 
                                                                       For You to realize
                                                                               That You Belong With Me <3





    
  1. xdamxselx xdamxselx happy witty anniversary!
    posted a quote
    May 26, 2012 11:45pm UTC
    If you've ever had a crush on me god bless your poor misguided heart.

  2. xdamxselx xdamxselx happy witty anniversary!
    posted a quote
    May 26, 2012 4:58pm UTC
    me after running for one minute: i'm still alive, but i'm barely breathing

  3. xdamxselx xdamxselx happy witty anniversary!
    posted a quote
    February 19, 2012 10:07pm UTC
    Hey. Im ugly, you're
    hot.
    Opposites attact right?
    ;)
    ;)

  4. xdamxselx xdamxselx happy witty anniversary!
    posted a quote
    February 19, 2012 10:02pm UTC
    Friend: Why don't you have a boyfriend?
    Me: Because I'm a hot pot of rice who doesn't need no side dish.

  5. xdamxselx xdamxselx happy witty anniversary!
    posted a quote
    January 8, 2011 10:53pm UTC
    In Flo-Rida's song"Low"
    he states that Shawty
    is wearing the apple
    bottom jeans, the
    boots with the fur
    AND the Reeboks with
    the straps, what is she
    some kind of four
    legged morph
    woman. no wonder
    the whole club is
    looking at her.

  6. xdamxselx xdamxselx happy witty anniversary!
    posted a quote
    November 29, 2010 7:27pm UTC
    Dear Hair cutting lady,
    Does one or two inches, mean NOTHING to you ?
    Sincerely,
    girl who is now into hats.
    " DdD " o

  7. xdamxselx xdamxselx happy witty anniversary!
    posted a quote
    November 4, 2010 3:10pm UTC
    Jack and Jill went up the hill to get some marijuana.
    Jack got high & dropped his fly, And said " Do you wanna?"
    Jill said " Yes" & dropped her dress and then they had some fun...
    But silly Jill forgot her pill & now they have a son.
    ;P

  8. xdamxselx xdamxselx happy witty anniversary!
    posted a quote
    October 30, 2010 6:58pm UTC
    Remember in elementary school, when being line leader was a BIG deal ?

  9. xdamxselx xdamxselx happy witty anniversary!
    posted a quote
    October 30, 2010 6:54pm UTC
    Click the ♥,
    if you like it when the scissors glide through the paper so you dont have to cut.
    (:

  10. xdamxselx xdamxselx happy witty anniversary!
    posted a quote
    August 28, 2010 5:44pm UTC
    Me and My friend were talking
    And I say " My mind was blown when I realized DAMMIT IM MAD backwards is DAMMIT IM MAD. She then says, " MY MIND WAS BLOWN WHEN I REALIZED EDWARD CULLEN SPELLED BACKWARDS IS GAY!" I knew I made friends with the right people (:

  11. xdamxselx xdamxselx happy witty anniversary!
    posted a quote
    August 28, 2010 5:38pm UTC
    p30pl3 VVh0 r1t3 l1k3 d1$. Go die.

  12. xdamxselx xdamxselx happy witty anniversary!
    posted a quote
    August 28, 2010 5:34pm UTC
    Liking your own status on facebook, or own quote on witty, Is like high fiving yourself.

  13. xdamxselx xdamxselx happy witty anniversary!
    posted a quote
    August 28, 2010 5:32pm UTC
    My Mom: That Girl Has Such a Pretty Voice!
    Me: Mom, that's Justin Bieber.
    ** Sorry to the Justin Bieber Fans! True story thoughh! LOL ;)

  14. xdamxselx xdamxselx happy witty anniversary!
    posted a quote
    August 28, 2010 5:27pm UTC
    Don't you hate it when you see a quote that says,
    " If I get 900 faves... etc" & that quote has 1000 faves? Like WTF?

  15. xdamxselx xdamxselx happy witty anniversary!
    posted a quote
    August 27, 2010 9:09pm UTC
    Ralph was driving home one evening when he suddely realizes that it's his daughter's birthday and he hasn't bought her a present.He drives to the mall, runs to the toy store and says to the shop assistant, "How much is that barbie in the window?"
    Which barbie?" the clerk says."We have barbie goes to the gym, barbie goes nightclubbing, barbie goes to the ball,barbie goes shopping and barbie goes to the beach. Each for $19.95. And barbie gets divorced for $265.00."
    Ralph asks, "Why does Divorced barbie cost $265.00."
    "Thats obvious" the sales lady says. "Divorced Barbie comes with Ken's house,Ken's car, Ken's Boat, Ken's furniture, Ken's money................" <3

  16. xdamxselx xdamxselx happy witty anniversary!
    posted a quote
    August 27, 2010 9:01pm UTC
    An Elephant meets a naked man. After a few seconds of silence the man screams
    " WHY ARE YOU SO SILENT?!"
    The elephant then screamed " HOW DO YOU BREATH THROUGH THAT SMALL THING?"
    ** make it pretty? Credit for the quote. <3 (:

  17. xdamxselx xdamxselx happy witty anniversary!
    posted a quote
    August 27, 2010 8:52pm UTC
    It would be weird if Taylor Swift married James Taylor... because then she'd be Taylor Taylor. It would be even weirder if she became a tailor. Because then she'd be Taylor Taylor the tailor.

  18. xdamxselx xdamxselx happy witty anniversary!
    posted a quote
    August 26, 2010 8:37pm UTC
    Hi, Im the bridge jumping friend your parents warned you about. (:

  19. xdamxselx xdamxselx happy witty anniversary!
    posted a quote
    August 18, 2010 5:52am UTC
    When Life Gives You a Bad Romance, show everyone your Poker Face, buy a new Telephone, call Alejandro, and you guys Just Dance! <3

  20. xdamxselx xdamxselx happy witty anniversary!
    posted a quote
    July 23, 2010 11:52am UTC
    please read, it's so adorable.(=
    I was walking around in a Target store, when I saw a Cashier hand this little boy some money back.
    The boy couldn't have been more than 5 or 6 years old.
    The Cashier said, 'I'm sorry, but you don't have enough money to buy this doll.'
    Then the little boy turned to the old woman next to him: ''Granny, are you sure I don't have enough money?''
    The old lady replied: ''You know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.''
    Then she asked him to stay there for just 5 minutes while she went to look a round. She left quickly.
    The little boy was still holding the doll in his hand.
    Finally, I walked toward him and I asked him who he wished to give this doll to.
    'It's the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for Christmas.
    She was sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her.'
    I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus would bring it to her after all, and not to worry.
    But he replied to me sadly. 'No, Santa Claus can't bring it to her where she is now.
    I have to give the doll to my mommy so that she can give it to my sister when she goes there.'
    His eyes were so sad while saying this. 'My Sister has gone to be with God.
    Daddy says that Mommy is going to see God very soon too, so I thought that she could take the doll with her to give it to my sister.''
    My heart nearly stopped.
    The little boy looked up at me and said: 'I told daddy to tell mommy not to go yet.
    I need her to wait until I come back from the mall.'
    Then he showed me a very nice photo of him where he was laughing.
    DRUNK DRIVING.
    He then told me 'I want mommy to take my picture with her so she won't forget me.'
    'I love my mommy and I wish she doesn't have to leave me, but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister.'
    Then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly.
    I quickly reached for my wallet and said to the boy. 'Suppose we check
    Again, just in case you do have enough money for the doll?''
    'OK' he said, 'I hope I do have enough.'
    I added some of my money to his with out him seeing and we started to count it.
    There was enough for the doll and even some spare money.
    The little boy said: 'Thank you God for giving me enough money!'
    Then he looked at me and added, 'I asked last night before I went to sleep for God to make sure I had enough money to buy this doll,
    so that mommy could give It to my sister. He heard me!''
    'I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mommy, but I didn't dare to ask God for too much.
    But He gave me enough to buy the doll and a white rose.''
    'My mommy loves white roses.'
    A few minutes later, the old lady returned and I left with my basket.
    I finished my shopping in a totally different state from when I started.
    I couldn't get the little boy out of my mind.
    Then I remembered a local news paper article two days ago,
    which mentioned a drunk man in a truck, who hit a car occupied by a young woman and a little girl.
    The little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical state.
    The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-sustaining machine, because the young woman would not be able to recover from the coma.
    Was this the family of the little boy?
    Two days after this encounter with the little boy, I read in the news paper that the young woman had passed away.
    I couldn't stop myself as I bought a bunch of white roses and I went to the funeral home where the body of the young woman was exposed for people to see and make last wishes before her burial.
    She was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest.
    I left the place, teary-eyed, feeling that my life had been changed for ever.
    The love that the little boy had for his mother and his sister is still, to this day, hard to imagine.
    And in a fraction of a second, a drunk driver had taken all this away from him.
    Now you have two choices ;
    1) Repost this message.
    2) Or Pretend It Never Tocuhed Your Heart.

:)

Join · Top Quotes · New Quotes · Random · Chat · Add Quote · Rules · Privacy Policy · Terms of Use · Full Site
© 2003-2024 Witty Profiles