Witty Profiles

swiftie_13

1. swiftie_13
   posted a quote
   July 8, 2013 12:12pm UTC
   PMS
   When you get so upset your sister stole your tweezers that you make your dad drill a padlock on your closet door and you shove all your belongings in it.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 1 point
2. swiftie_13
   posted a quote
   May 12, 2013 3:18pm UTC
   The amout of selfies I've taken with my cat is ridiculous
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 3 points
3. swiftie_13
   posted a quote
   April 24, 2013 5:00pm UTC
   Whenever i'm thinking of an embarassing moment that i had i tell my brain to shut up
   The only problem is i do it out loud
   so i tend to get some strange looks
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 8 points
4. swiftie_13
   posted a quote
   April 9, 2013 8:18pm UTC
   So at dinner today I tried to use every reference I possibly could.
   It was everywhere from silver unicorns to redvines are totally awesome and i even said YOU GO GLEN COCO completely out of context and no one understood then my dad tried to quote ed sheeran and failed
   i live in a family of peasants.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 1 point
5. swiftie_13
   posted a quote
   March 24, 2013 12:34pm UTC
   My little sister's soccer team just lost 2-0.
   Guess who scored the 2 goals.
   My sister and her friend. On her team.
   They scored against themselves.
   Twice.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 15 points
6. swiftie_13
   posted a quote
   February 7, 2013 5:54pm UTC
   *phone rings*
   Me: Hello?
   Recording: This is a notification that schools will be closed tom-
   Me: WOOOOOOOOOOO
   Recording: I'm sorry, that is not a valid response.
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 25 points
7. swiftie_13
   posted a quote
   February 3, 2013 12:45pm UTC
   Me: *walks downstairs at 1 wearing a bathrobe*
   Family: *arguing about bathrobes*
   Dad: But why would you wear a bathrobe all day unless you're 65?
   Me:
   Dad:
   Me:
   Dad:
   Me: *goes back upstairs*
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 4 points

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