Witty Profiles

socks

1. socks
   posted a quote
   August 26, 2012 2:50am UTC
   Guys I'm actually begging you, can someone suggest some really good books? I just can't find any good ones lately. Any sort of book will do, just as long as it's not for five year olds or just a plain terrible book. And please don't suggest the Hunger Games of 50 Shades of Grey or any of the really popular books that I've most likely already read. Thank you!
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 24 points
2. socks
   posted a quote
   August 20, 2012 4:52am UTC
   And the Lord said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life."
   But John came fifth an won a toaster.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 6 points
3. socks
   posted a quote
   July 20, 2012 8:43am UTC
   Person: The bible is the best selling book of all time.
   Me: The Big Mac is the best selling burger of all time.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 2 points
4. socks
   posted a quote
   July 20, 2012 8:40am UTC
   Person: Obama wants to destroy the tradition of marriage by allowing it to be between two men!
   Other 'traditions' we've destroyed:
   - Slavery
   - No women's rights
   - Segregation
   - Child labor
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 3 points
5. socks
   posted a quote
   July 20, 2012 8:31am UTC
   You never see a church with wifi
   Because no church wants to compete with another invisible power that actually works.
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 40 points
6. socks
   posted a quote
   July 20, 2012 8:27am UTC
   me: i'm atheist
   everyone i know: ha, you're so stupid! something can't come from nothing, idiot
   everyone i know: god doesn't count
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 3 points
7. socks
   posted a quote
   July 20, 2012 8:20am UTC
   god: thou shalt not kill
   god: *kills everyone on earth except for a medium sized family*
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 7 points
8. socks
   posted a quote
   July 20, 2012 7:26am UTC
   America:
   Where being obese is 'genetic' but being gay is a lifestyle choice.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 22 points
9. socks
   posted a quote
   July 12, 2012 4:12pm UTC
   Not sure if my crush likes me,
   Or is just being nice to me coz he knows
   I like him and doesn't want to hurt
   my feelings.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 5 points
10. socks
    posted a quote
    July 12, 2012 3:59pm UTC
    click to see this quote
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 14 points
11. socks
    posted a quote
    July 7, 2012 8:29pm UTC
    at work yesterday
    little kid: *crying*
    me: aw are you okay little dude?
    kid: no. my mum won't buy me any toys.
    kid: *sudden idea*
    kid: so you know what i'm gunna do about that?
    kid: i'm gunna step on ALL the cracks in the sidewalk
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 3 points
12. socks
    posted a quote
    July 7, 2012 8:04pm UTC
    click to see this quote
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 7 points
13. socks
    posted a quote
    June 30, 2012 2:08pm UTC
    someone please explain
    Adam Eve
    ♂ ♀
    ↓
    Cain Able
    ♂ ♂
    ↓
    ?
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 3 points
14. socks
    posted a quote
    June 28, 2012 1:53pm UTC
    click to see this quote
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 27 points
15. socks
    posted a quote
    June 1, 2012 9:31pm UTC
    I know it makes no sense,
    but what else can I do?
    HOW CAN I MOVE ON, WHEN I'M STILL IN
    love with you?
    DO NOT ERASE THE FORMAT CREDIT© format by: br0kenwings
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 3 points
16. socks
    posted a quote
    May 26, 2012 10:17pm UTC
    'It's impossible,'
    s a i d P r i d e .
    'It's risky,'
    s a i d E x p e r i e n c e.
    'It's pointless,'
    s a i d R e a s o n.
    'Come on, give it a try,'
    whispered the Heart.
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 7 points
17. socks
    posted a quote
    May 26, 2012 7:36pm UTC
    heart: i need to vent, let's go on witty
    brain: no, you have an important assignment to do
    heart: screw you brain, you have no heart!
    brain: and you have no brain idiot
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 16 points

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