20 ways to annoy your roommate. . .
1.Send secret admirer notes on your roommate's e-mail.
2.Sit on the floor and talk to the wall.
3.When you walk into your room turn off your lights. Turn them on when you leave.
4.Refuse to communicate in anything but sign language.
5.Set off the smoke alarm in your room and tell the fire department your roommate was smoking.
6.Create an animal cemetery in your floor. Hold memorial services. If your roommate complains, tell him/her that s/he has no respect for the dead.
7.Buy a jack-in-the-box. Every day, turn the handle until the clown pops out. Scream continuously for twenty minutes.
8.Nail meat to the walls. Bacon is best.
9.Lick his/her feet as he sleeps. If s/he wakes up, apologize. After s/he falls asleep, start licking his/her face.
10.Watch TV continually. Change channels so that you only see the commercials. Memorize the commercials verbatim and chant them after lights out.
11.When your roommate is out of the room move his/her possessions over to your side of the room. When s/he returns, throw the things back over to your roommate's side, angrily telling him/her, "Stop invading my space."
12.Whenever s/he is about to fall asleep, ask questions that start with "Didja ever wonder why...." Be creative.
13.Listen to radio static.
14.Give him/her an allowance.
15.Hide your underwear and socks in your roommate's closet. Accuse him/her of stealing it.
16.Shoot rubber bands at your roommate while his/her back is turned and then look away quickly.
17.Get a computer. Leave it on when you are not using it. Turn it off when you are.
18.Ask your roommate if your family can move in "just for a couple of weeks."
19.Smoke ballpoint pens.
20.Smoke mistletoe. Do whatever comes naturally.
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