Witty Profiles

karsonblake

1. karsonblake
   posted a quote
   November 12, 2013 11:36pm UTC
   Sales clerk: Are you going to pay for that?
   Me: Nope, I'm shoplifting all the way to the cash register.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 28 points
2. karsonblake
   posted a quote
   November 12, 2013 11:28pm UTC
   Teacher: We are going to play the Quiet Game.
   Me: Are you playing too?
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 11 points
3. karsonblake
   posted a quote
   November 10, 2013 5:27pm UTC
   Thanksgiving = Family Dysfunction at it's best.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 22 points
4. karsonblake
   posted a quote
   October 22, 2013 7:34pm UTC
   I don't see how people can sleep with nightlights. My room has to be as dark as my soul.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 25 points
5. karsonblake
   posted a quote
   August 20, 2013 6:46pm UTC
   I refuse to get into a battle of wits
   with someone who is unarmed.
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 9 points
6. karsonblake
   posted a quote
   August 19, 2013 6:33pm UTC
   "That's what." -She
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 108 points
7. karsonblake
   posted a quote
   August 13, 2013 6:00pm UTC
   Those girls who come up to
   guys, act dumb, and talk in a
   fake high pitched voice....
   Stop it.
   You're not being cute.
   You're being ridiculous.
   All you're doing is setting
   yourself up to be used.
   Trust me, I know;
   I am a guy.
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 13 points
8. karsonblake
   posted a quote
   July 16, 2013 11:51pm UTC
   That moment when
   you realize that you're in love
   with the person who just walked
   away.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 12 points
9. karsonblake
   posted a quote
   June 6, 2013 5:16pm UTC
   Annoying Orange?
   Really Cartoon Network?
   ............ really??
   -___-
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 11 points
10. karsonblake
    posted a quote
    June 4, 2013 1:58am UTC
    Me at the store:
    Me: *puts down 22 things*
    Cashier: oh, would you like a bag with that?
    Me: No. I'm just going to put it all in my pocket.
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 16 points
11. karsonblake
    posted a quote
    June 4, 2013 1:18am UTC
    Sorry, I can't today.
    My sister's friend's father's grandparent's
    brother's sister's grandson's uncle's pet
    rock died.
    And yes, it was very tragic.
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 6 points
12. karsonblake
    posted a quote
    June 4, 2013 1:11am UTC
    Me?
    Sarcastic??
    Never.
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 6 points
13. karsonblake
    posted a quote
    June 4, 2013 12:50am UTC
    Sometimes I need only what
    you can provide:
    Your absence.
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 6 points
14. karsonblake
    posted a quote
    June 2, 2013 2:36am UTC
    Me: *falls down*
    Sister: Did you just fall?
    Me: No, I just attacked the floor.
    Sister: Backwards?
    Me: I'm that freaking talented.
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 12 points
15. karsonblake
    posted a quote
    June 2, 2013 12:44am UTC
    How normal people flirt:
    "Hey sexy ;)"
    How I flirt:
    "If you were a tree... you'd be a good tree. c:"
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 7 points
16. karsonblake
    posted a quote
    May 23, 2013 12:37pm UTC
    "They who dream by
    day are cognizant of
    many things which
    escape those who
    dream at night."
    -Edgar Allan Poe
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 7 points
17. karsonblake
    posted a quote
    May 6, 2013 1:20am UTC
    Police: Anything you say or do will be held against you.
    Me: Scarlett Johansson
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 5 points
18. karsonblake
    posted a quote
    May 6, 2013 1:13am UTC
    Me: So I heard you like bad
    boys.
    Her: Yeah?
    Me: I don't mean to brag or anything but when I play Wii, I don't put the safety strap on. ;)
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 12 points
19. karsonblake
    posted a quote
    May 6, 2013 12:55am UTC
    Why fall in love
    when you can fall asleep?
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 6 points
20. karsonblake
    posted a quote
    May 5, 2013 2:22am UTC
    " If you take no pain,
    you get no gain."
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 7 points

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