Witty Profiles

greeneggs

1. greeneggs
   posted a quote
   January 2, 2013 5:23pm UTC
   Do any of you have Instagram?
   f4f?
   @Letthecatsout
   Comment below your user so I know who to follow!(:
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 5 points
2. greeneggs
   posted a quote
   January 2, 2013 1:50am UTC
   That awkward moment
   when even your cat won't cuddle with you...
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 6 points
3. greeneggs
   posted a quote
   January 2, 2013 1:33am UTC
   "What would put you off a girl?"
   Liam: "If she farted"
   Harry: "If she spat on me"
   Louis: "Well, if she punched me in the face..."
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 10 points
4. greeneggs
   posted a quote
   January 2, 2013 12:30am UTC
   "If a man whistles you, don't turn around, ignore him.
   You're a lady, not a dog."
   -Niall Horan
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 9 points
5. greeneggs
   posted a quote
   January 2, 2013 12:18am UTC
   lukebrooks♥
   Last night was so fun baba, we should do it again some time? ;)
   ▼
   ■ Anonymous
   Grandma?
   Ask lukebrooks a question 336 notes
   ◀
   nmf
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 12 points
6. greeneggs
   posted a quote
   January 2, 2013 12:16am UTC
   lukebrooks♥
   Have you gotten head before?
   ▼
   ■ Anonymous
   Well, most times when I flip a coin it lands on tail, but sometimes I do get head.
   Ask lukebrooks a question 394 notes
   ◀
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 9 points
7. greeneggs
   posted a quote
   January 1, 2013 11:58pm UTC
   Tell a therapist, not Facebook...
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 10 points
8. greeneggs
   posted a quote
   January 1, 2013 10:39pm UTC
   When someone yells stop, I never know if it's in the name of love, it's hammer time, or if I should collaborate and listen.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 2 points
9. greeneggs
   posted a quote
   January 1, 2013 10:34pm UTC
   The most passive aggressive argument in existence:
   "K."
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 1 point
10. greeneggs
    posted a quote
    January 1, 2013 10:31pm UTC
    click to see this quote
    
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11. greeneggs
    posted a quote
    December 15, 2012 11:52am UTC
    I don't think you guys understand....
    Yeah, maybe a lot of people die in America from guns, but if you take them away people will still die.
    Fire
    Knives
    Strangulation
    There's many other ways you can kill someone. I'm not trying to sound morbid, but it's true.
    If someone wants you dead then they are going to find a way to do it. It doesn't matter if they have a gun or not.
    
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12. greeneggs
    posted a quote
    December 14, 2012 11:06pm UTC
    click to see this quote
    
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13. greeneggs
    posted a quote
    December 13, 2012 6:27pm UTC
    click to see this quote
    
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14. greeneggs
    posted a quote
    December 13, 2012 2:37pm UTC
    In Geometry....
    *Mrs. Winters does a problem*
    Cole: WOW! MRS. WINTERS, YOU JUST BLEW MY MIND!
    *Mrs. Winters does half of another problem then turns and looks at Cole*
    Mrs. Winters: Cole, are you ready tobe blown?
    True. Story.
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 4 points
15. greeneggs
    posted a quote
    December 13, 2012 2:31pm UTC
    Real eyes realize real lies
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 3 points
16. greeneggs
    posted a quote
    December 13, 2012 9:27am UTC
    Me: *Pushes Dawson's book of his desk*
    Dawson: HEY THAT'S MY BOOK!
    Me: No, I thought it was a unicorn...
    10 minutes later
    Me: How's your unicorn, Dawson?
    Dawson: You know, it's good. It's horn is long and hard, and it has lots of glitter on it!
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 10 points
17. greeneggs
    posted a quote
    December 13, 2012 9:16am UTC
    Yesterday's convo with little boy..
    Him: *Walks up* I don't like people with glasses.... Take them off
    Me: Um, okay.. *Takes of glasses*
    Him: You're hot. *Walks away*
    Lol, I think he needed glasses of his own.
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 7 points
18. greeneggs
    posted a quote
    November 30, 2012 2:16pm UTC
    Whoever watched The Amanda Show
    As a kid...
    Had a good childhood.
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 7 points
19. greeneggs
    posted a quote
    November 24, 2012 11:15pm UTC
    Everyone was so excited about Breaking Dawn Pt. 2,
    And I am over here like: THE HOBBIT. December 14th!
    Omg, how frickin' nerdy am I?
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 0 points
20. greeneggs
    posted a quote
    November 21, 2012 10:14pm UTC
    Am I the only person that..
    hates all the stories that get posted on witty?
    If I wanted to read your f/cking story, I'd be on a story website, not a quote one...
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 3 points

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