I need to vent.
I hate that we have grown apart. I went to you for EVERYTHING! You were my bestfriend and worst enemy. I lost sooo many friends because of you. You put me through hell and you know it. You didn't care, you acted like you did. We made promises and you broke them. You are such a different person now. Is this what I get for hanging out with people older than me? I don't know, but seriously I miss our friendship more than anything. You say we haven't grown apart but in reality we would hang out every weekend, now we haven't hung out together since June or July. I don't even remember. We hang out at competitions but I know sooner or later I will lose 3 of my bestfriends because I became attached to you. I can't let you go. I know this is wierd because you are my friend not a boyfriend or anything but you don't even know. I used to be a emotional wreck. I miss you so much. You act like you are fine, maybe you are? I wish you knew that it is killing me inside. I thought I was over our friendship, but then cheer season started again and it starts all over again. I can't go through what you put me through last year. I can't lose close friends again. I can't lose you again though. I don't even know what to do. You say we're still sissys but whatever. I would believe you if you acted like it. We made a promise that we would both get high for the first time together, but no you do it like every weekend. I know I was only 12 and you were 16 when we made that promise but you shouldn't have broke it. You are a huge hypocrite and you want attention. You think you are better at cheer than me, but you started last year, its my 9 and hald year. You make me so mad but again so happy. I feel like you use me for something, something that I haven't quite figured out. I want to be happy again. I wish you would have never came into me life, but everything happens for a reason? I don't the reason why you put me through hell? To make me a stronger person, doubtful. It has made me a wreck. I think about how we used to hang out all the time, knowing nothing will ever be the same between us. What happened to us? I couldn't tell you, I can't say any of this to you but i needed to get this off my chest. I still don't feel any better but it helped a little.
cheerleaderr13
