You're with her, again?
Do you understand what you're doing to me? Do you understand that I see you with her in the halls everyday, and my heart breaks more and more. Looking at you being happy with someone else just completely tears me apart inside. I put on a smile everyday just to lie to my friends, and tell them I'm over you because it's been so long.. I can't even look at your Facebook page. I can't deal with looking at your relationship status. I can't stand looking at her. She has everything I've ever wanted; you. This is the hardest thing I've ever had to push myself through. I have to get up every day, and realize that you're over me.. They say I'd never get you, 'cause me and you weren't meant to be. They don't understand. No one understands. I need you. You're everything to me. Nothing's changed. I never wanted to lose you. I would choose you over anyone. No one could take your place. It just kills me; your smile, your laugh, your hair, your eyes, the way you use to look at me, the way you'd hold my hand along the beach, the cute bike rides during sunset, the sneaking out to the beach at midnight just to be alone, the way you'd play with my hair, the way you said "I love you", the way you meant it, the jokes we had, the laughs we shared, everything. I know you love her now. I'm sorry it's this way, I really am. It gets harder everyday. I hope you're happy with her. She doesn't deserve you, no one does. You're perfect. I just miss you, so much. I make my 11:11 wishes about you, every night. I cry myself to sleep every night thinking of our memories. I wonder if you ever think about me. I hope you do. I hope you think back to that summer, when everything was perfect. You were my best friend. I want you to be happy, but I wish you were with me. I wish you could just see I could love you more than she ever could. I'm crying just writing this, because it brings back all the pain. I wish we could have one last kiss. Just to prove it's over. To help me move on. I wish i could send this to you, so you know how much you've hurt me, and how much I miss you. I can't help myself. I'll probably never be completely over you, ever. Even when I'm happily married and in love with kids, I'll think back to that summer, our summer, and miss you. Maybe I'll even miss you everyday for the rest of my life. You were my first love, my first real love. Nothing will change that. All I know is that it's time to try new people, to move on. To let you be happy, and suck it up. I just want you to know, I love you.♥
blakex3