XxBlueberriesxX

In The Dead Of Winter.
Prolouge
I've never ate so many mints, and drank so much cheap coffee in my entire life.
My day mostly consisted of old family members who I didn't remember, coming up to me saying the same things.
"Oh, look how much you've grown!" or "You look just like your mother!"
"I haven't seen you since you were this big," they'd say, holding thier hands about two feet above the ground. Then I'd have to pretend like I knew who they were, when I really had no idea.
When we first arrived at the funeral home, I felt really sick. I thought for sure I'd lose my breakfast that moring, which was only a piece of toast and half a glass of coffee. I was scared I might pass out by the time they opened the doors, signaling for us to go in and see her. I didn't want to go in first.
I slowly walked into the room, my cousin right next to me, triyng hard not to cry. As I neared my grandmothers casket, I felt my legs turn to lead, and my arms felt just as heavy at my sides.
My mouth tasted like metal.
I finally couldn't hold it in ny longer, and let the tears stream down my surley chalk white face. I glanced to my right, and caught glimpse of my aunt. Her lips looked unnaturally red against her tear-streaked pale face.
I saw the sad look in her eyes, and knew exactly how she felt.
~
After the viewing and service, we went straight to the cemetery. I picked a red rose, and threw it in on top if the casket. There was just something extra sad about all of it. I felt like not only was a burying my grandmother, but I was burying a part of me, too. I knew I would never get that part of me back.
I picked another white rose, and decided to keep it. It smelled like spring.
That day was cold, and I could see my breath. Below freezing.
It was in the dead of winter, and all I wanted was to be with gran.
That was the day I first considered something I'd never thought about before.
-One month later-

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