my life #33
why wont you just have a regular conversation with me, instead of getting bored and loggin off. i dont get what happened. i guess im just not cool enough for you anymore, or i am too you. i dont give a crap i fyou have a girlfriend because you know you used to tell me everything that happened, and you acted like you liked me, even if you completely worhsip her. you called me once and we talked for over an hour. i was at a sleepover. i missed a long tim e with on eof my best friends to talk to you and you dont even care anymore. you barely even remeber anything. you were honestly the nicest guy ive ever met. you wre not a jerk at all and i could say anything to you and we would just be happy whenever we were takling or we were together. i cant say that i have talked to a guy as nice as you. the rest are jerks but you are different. and you deserve way better than her. shes just a desparate girl who needs a guy because she cant stand not having a boyfriend. i dont get how you dont see any of this. and its not like i can tell you because that will just cause us to talk even less and grow farther apart. i dont even think anything next year will change. im pretty sure we both completely ruined our friendship, which was one of the most amazing ones ive had. you would ignore her texts and calls just to talk to me. so dont sya you didnt feel anything either. i know you, and if you really didnt want to talk, you wouldnt. and i guess now you dont want to talk because you wont answere me or anything. I really dont get how you dont see it. i miss having the best times with you. and i miss talking all night until i fell asleep, and then continueing in the morning. i miss talking about everything that was going on, and you helping me with all the bad things in my life. i miss you constantly asking me who i like, and i would just say a random guy from my school, because i never really wanted to tell you the truth. maybe i should have, but i know it wouldnt of worked. i miss talking about you with my friend, and examining every sinlge thing you did all day long. i miss teasing eachother in the hallway when we saw eachother, and acting too cool to care about eachother when we were with out friends. i miss knowing everything about you, and now things changed, you and i changed, and now we are complete strangers. i miss going home from school and haveing a text from you. i miss talking and texting all the time. and when i say all the time, im dead serious. i miss noticing everything about you, and laughing abou teverything with you, like hwen you got a haircut. i miss my teacher looking at us like we were perfect, when obviously we weren't, no matter how much i wanted us to be. i miss you being the second guy i ever loved. the second guy who ever actully made me feel the craziest emotions i have ever felt. i miss not being able to contian it, and bursting out laughing in class, almost in tears from just thinking about you. i miss all the songs i dont listen to anymore, because they remind me of you, and i cant even think about what used to be. i miss talking about you non-stop and getting butterflies everytime i saw you. i miss giving you tips on which calogne will get the girls, but we were always joking because you can already do that with your amazing personality. i miss helping you sew in lifeskills, becaus eyou didnt have a clue what to do. i miss getting out of spanish just to go to your class and pretend i was talking wiht some friends, but really you wree the only thing that was on my mind. i miss having amazing dreams about you that i just wish could actully happen in real life. i miss having you be the center of my conversations, and when people asked if i still liked you, i just couldnt lie. i miss being jealous of another girls amazing personality, because she could really make you laugh. i miss you not being perfect, but i was okay with that. i miss that amazing moment when your name flashes on my screen. i miss thinking everything about you, and every word you ever spoke, was completely, and inevitably amazing. i miss your presence overpowering me. i miss being able to tel when you walked in the room, even when i was facing the other way, because thats just how much you have effected me. i miss talking about how i havent kissed anyone, and praying that just maybe, you would say you would be my first kiss. i miss you telling me all about hre, even when i didnt want to know. i remeber not wanting to text you, so that i wouldnt seem desparate. i miss looking forward to you telling me everything that happened that day. i remeber talking about all your exs and thinking how much better i would be for you. i miss crying every night for every god damn thing that had anything to do with you. i remeber making fun of you for playing soccer, even though that i s extrememly sexy. i miss having my friends tell me that you werent right for me, and having them tell me that i could do so much better. you were absolutly good enough for me, and i wont ever want anythign else. i miss talking to you about guys who were being jerks, and telling you anything mean a guy had ever said to me. i miss not telling you things, and you getting al mad. i miss you trusting me with every secret, and me the same with you. i miss my brother screaming out your name every time he saw i was talking to you. i miss him telling his friends all about how we talk every night, and tehm thinking it was crazy and gross. i miss having you to come home to talk to, and knowing you were there when ever i needed you. i miss you. everything about you. i just miss you.
wish you were here- avril lavigne
blame it on the rain- he is we
and so much more.
i miss you<3
TryToStealYourHeart