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enchantedartic
posted a quote
July 10, 2012 5:15am UTC

You know what fairy tales taught me?
that every fat, ugly, old person is evil and is going to try and kill me.
But somehow every fat, ugly, old person I've met is truly nice and has never tried to f/u/ck up my life.
__
<(A).(A)>
II II
= =
enchantedartic

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enchantedartic
posted a quote
July 9, 2012 10:04pm UTC

Annoying dad quotes 2#
Me: *Sitting down watching TV*
Dad: wanna hear a cat joke?!
Me: *looks at him* No thanks. *Looks back*
Dad: OH you gotta be kitten me!
enchantedartic

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kristabff
posted a quote
March 2, 2013 7:31pm UTC

'unfollowers'
Spelled backwards is srewollofnu. Which sounds like "screw all of you".
Coincidence? I think not.

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yourcool
posted a quote
March 19, 2013 9:14pm UTC

have you ever had a legitimate crush on
an actor like to the point where you're not even fangirling anymore, you just actually love them.

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yourcool
posted a quote
March 19, 2013 9:17pm UTC

have you ever had one of those days where
your hair looks like Hagrid's from Harry Potter?

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yourcool
posted a quote
March 19, 2013 9:20pm UTC

i'm honestly so surprised that
no one has ever punched me in the face.

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yourcool
posted a quote
March 19, 2013 9:23pm UTC

when i was in eighth grade,
some girl was sitting on the stairs outside at recess, talking to her friends. and she goes "someone please hit me in the face." and when i walked up to her and hit her in the face she gave me a dirty look as if she didn't just ask.

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yourcool
posted a quote
March 19, 2013 9:28pm UTC

i used to be so depressed to the point where i woke up and wouldn't get out of bed because nothing had meaning to me. i'd cut myself off from even my closest friends and family, but one day you just have to pick yourself up. you look in the mirror and decide it's time to be happy. you work slowly day by day, enjoying the sun and exercising and spending time with loved ones. and one morning you'll wake up, get out of bed, look in the mirror and smile because you're alive.

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yourcool
posted a quote
March 19, 2013 9:37pm UTC

my milkshake brings all the boys to the yard
and they're like can i have some and i'm like no screw off what do you think this is charity

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yourcool
posted a quote
March 19, 2013 9:41pm UTC

droppin' outta school to
become a cheetah girl.

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yourcool
posted a quote
March 19, 2013 9:45pm UTC

why can't everyone just wear
the same outfits every day just like they do in cartoons.

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yourcool
posted a quote
March 17, 2013 4:44pm UTC

if plan A didn't work, stay cool.
there's 25 more letters in the alphabet. you're screwed when you're on Z.

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yourcool
posted a quote
March 17, 2013 4:53pm UTC

i can't wait to not have kids and
spend all the money on myself.

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yourcool
posted a quote
March 17, 2013 4:58pm UTC

i've got 99 problems and
i'm not dealing with any of them.

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yourcool
posted a quote
March 17, 2013 5:00pm UTC

my life is just a collection of poorly made
decisions with alternative music playing in the background.

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yourcool
posted a quote
March 17, 2013 5:03pm UTC

the perks of being an
ugly piece of sh/t.

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yourcool
posted a quote
March 17, 2013 5:19pm UTC

i'm gonna take a picture of my firstborn
and use an age progression software to figure out what he'll look like when he's 18. then i'm going to frame the picture in our house so that he'll see it as he's growing up.when he eventually realizes that it's a picture of him, i'm going to try to convice him that he's a time traveler.

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yourcool
posted a quote
March 17, 2013 5:27pm UTC

stop complaining about being single.
we have bigger problems here. like why mcdonald's doesn't serve breakfast after 1030am.

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yourcool
posted a quote
March 17, 2013 5:39pm UTC

calories (noun);
tiny creatures that life in your closet and sew your clothes a little bit tighter every night.

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capsized*
posted a quote
March 19, 2013 12:41am UTC

YOU'RE TALKING LOUD,
not saying much.

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