The first time I saw you, I'll never forget it.. I thought you had the coolest eye color ever. I never imagined that day would change everything. I never knew I would fall in love so deeply. I never knew my heart would be taken by someone so kind, gentle, and caring. I thought I had found the one. I thought you were going to be my husband and the father of my children. I had the most amazing times with you; from pestering you and Tj in Spanish to New Years Eve night<3, movies, the Lancer, and Ihop, Walmart, and Gordman's. Things were great.. I never thought we would have a last kiss, hug, touch, a last time to make love, or a last look. I remember our last kiss, I remember how hard it was to let you get into that car and just leave. It was so hard trying not to cry in front of you. I wanted to look strong. Everything I had ever wanted was taken from me the week after you left. Then the real you shined when you left. That "kind, gentle, caring" person wasn't so kind, gentle, and caring. He was more hateful, selfish, and dishonest. Three of the worst qualities a person could have. It's amazing how you fooled everyone into thinking you cared or loved me even half the amount a really did for you. I have hurt you. I have been and done wrong. But I think one punishment is enough. I'm sorry I can't be good enough for you. I'm sorry I won't drop my life and move to New Jeresy right away. I'm sorry I was unfaithful. I'm sorry I lost your trust. I'm sorry I ruined everything. I'm sorry my body wasn't strong enough for our baby.. I'm sorry I've let you get the best of me. But I'm truly sorry for ever loving you. Not because I regret it, I would never, but just for the simple fact that I let you hurt me.. Over and over. I didn't mean to give you the power to crush someone the way you have crushed me. It hurt so bad, more and more each time yet I continue to let it happen. No longer will I be cruel to myself. I can't do this anymore. I love you more than words could ever explain.. More than you will ever know. It kills me so bad but I can't do this anymore. I told you this would happen. I knew I wouldn't be wrong. Sending this will be the hardest thing to do. But it must be done in order for me to move on. I won't delete you, for now, until it gets too hard to bare. Please forgive my stupidity. I've been dimwitted and ignorant. But my eyes are now clear and I can see I want no part in this game. I will end this with one last good bye. I'm truly walking away. Although I would love for you to ask me to stay, tell me you love and miss me, or come up with a million and one excuses; spare me. One last time, Goodbye. I love you.
About me:
Hay_Bay16