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Fabulouis

  1. cocopuffs cocopuffs
    posted a quote
    January 19, 2014 12:30am UTC
    -"Hi, can I help you?"
    "No I just stood in line for 10 minutes to say hi."

  2. cocopuffs cocopuffs
    posted a quote
    January 19, 2014 12:41am UTC
    Most realationships are like me: They don't work out

  3. cocopuffs cocopuffs
    posted a quote
    January 19, 2014 12:59am UTC
    When I die, I want my last words to be,
    "I left a million dollars under..."

  4. cocopuffs cocopuffs
    posted a quote
    January 19, 2014 1:03am UTC
    I
    Straight up
    have no idea
    how
    porcupines f uck each other

  5. cocopuffs cocopuffs
    posted a quote
    January 19, 2014 1:08am UTC
    Don't cry because it's over,
    smile because his
    new girlfriend
    looks like a horse.

  6. cocopuffs cocopuffs
    posted a quote
    January 19, 2014 1:12am UTC
    Taco: Do you want to taco about it?
    Nacho: It's nacho problem
    Jalapeno: That dude was jalapeno your business

  7. cocopuffs cocopuffs
    posted a quote
    January 19, 2014 1:16am UTC
    Hey, auto-correct
    quit tampering with
    my curse words
    you mother forklift.

  8. cocopuffs cocopuffs
    posted a quote
    January 19, 2014 1:22am UTC
    Alternatives for "Calm your t.its"
    • soothe your boobs
    • de-stress your breasts
    • undo the calamity that is your mammaries
    • adjust your bust before it combusts
    I also like:
    • give that chest a rest
    • hakuna your tatas
    • don'y have a rack attack

  9. cocopuffs cocopuffs
    posted a quote
    January 19, 2014 1:33am UTC
    "Camel Toe"
    crotch waffle
    vertical taco
    calamari cresent roll
    snot wallet
    pocket pie
    zipper muffin
    beef curtains
    pee flapper
    hefty cleft
    folded pancake
    slot pocket
    skin canoe

  10. cocopuffs cocopuffs
    posted a quote
    January 19, 2014 1:53am UTC
    You clench your teeth.
    You look up.
    You tell yourself that if they see you cry,
    it will hurt them,
    and you will be nothing but A Sadness in their lives,
    and you must not become a mere sadness,
    so you will not cry,
    and you say all of this to yourself
    while looking up at the ceiling,
    and then you swallow even though
    your throat does not want to close
    and you look at the person
    who loves you and smile.
    -John Green, The Fault in Our Stars

:)

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