Mandypandy posted a quote
December 2, 2013 7:31pm UTC
One day, scissors will be for paper again. One day, razors will be for shaving again. One day, cutting will be for art and crafts again. One day, sadness will be temporary again. One day, life will be fun again. One day... We will recover.
Sheldon: Scissors cuts paper, paper covers rock, rock crushes lizard, lizard poisons Spock, Spock smashes scissors, scissors decapitates lizard, lizard eats paper, paper disproves Spock, Spock vaporizes rock, and as it always has, rock crushes scissors
Jesse_James posted a quote
August 7, 2013 10:39pm UTC
Boy: So, I hear you like bad boys? Girl: Uhm yeah? Boy: Well, I don't want to impress you or anything but I ran with scissors today Girl: My sister is in the hospital because someone stabbed her while running with scissors. Boy: That was your sister?! Girl: ... nmf/nmq
DeathOfASon posted a quote
July 13, 2013 4:01pm UTC
throwing lamps at people who need to lighten up throwing handles at people who need to get a grip throwing refrigerators at people who need to chill throwing scissors at people who need to "cut it out" throwing straws at people who need to suck it up throwing bridges at people who need to get over it throwing knives at people who need to be stabbed...
I understand that scissors can beat paper. And I get how rock can beat scissors. But there's no way paper can beat rock. Paper is supposed to magically wrap around rock leaving it immobie? Why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors. Why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why. Because paper can't beat anybody. A rock would tear it up in two seconds. When I play rock paper scissors. I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in their face with my already clenched fist and say oh sorry, I thought paper would protect you.
Girl who sits next to me in choir: Hey, can I see your sheet of music for a minute? Me: *shows her the sheet* Girl: Ok, thanks! (we both stare at it while her hands have a mini-seizure) Girl: *flips the bird at my paper* Me: Girl: Me: Girl: Me: HAHAHAHA? *laughs confusedly* Girl: GAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Me: HAHAHAHA- Me: o_O ....WAIT WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING Girl: OOPS I was trying to make scissors Me: WHAT WHY WHAT WHAT WHAT HOW COULD YOU? *blubbers* Gir: *blubbers about scissors* Choir teacher: Ladies, please quiet down. I know that today is friday and that it's always very exciting but- *glances at us* -we need to get back to doing music.