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Lolwut Quotes

  1. Ryouta* Ryouta*
    posted a quote
    July 21, 2014 7:11pm UTC
    Me:*walking back to my 'group' at lunch*
    Girl:*stares intently*
    Me:*walks up to girl with a horrified look on my face*
    Me: DON'T LOOK AT ME!D:
    Me:
    Girl:
    Me: *walks away*
    True story.

  2. *sammi* *sammi*
    posted a quote
    January 28, 2014 4:01pm UTC
    format by ethanol~
    format by ethanol~
    Teacher: Why are you late?
    Studen't: I'm late?
    Teacher: You missed an entire period.
    Student: Are you telling me im pregnant?

  3. ImAwesome12345678 ImAwesome12345678
    posted a quote
    November 26, 2013 5:02am UTC
    NEVER when someone catches on fire
    do I see them "stop. drop. and roll."

  4. ♥Gianna♥* ♥Gianna♥*
    posted a quote
    November 15, 2013 4:17pm UTC
    [AT MY EXES WEDDING IN 2020]
    *holds up boom box playing i hit it first by Ray J*

  5. cloverchild cloverchild
    posted a quote
    October 28, 2013 5:37pm UTC
    Yahoo! Answers
    Open Question
    My girlfriend cheated on me?
    So yesterday I discovered that my girlfriend was cheating on me, today it was her birthday, i thought why not make this birthday of her the worst day of her life, so my plan was to poop and then put the poop in a gift box! So i did it and gave her the poop-gift with a letter about her cheating on me in it! Then I left her house immediately! Now i am excited about her reaction!
    16 minutes ago - 4 days left to answer.
    format jimmy365

  6. NEM0 NEM0
    posted a quote
    October 12, 2013 6:36pm UTC
    If you overreact when you're on your period just say, "Sorry, I'm ovary-acting." badum-tss.

  7. slybabyshambles slybabyshambles
    posted a quote
    October 5, 2013 3:27pm UTC
    I like the creatures.
    'nuff said.

  8. * Sabaism * * Sabaism *
    posted a quote
    September 12, 2013 8:39am UTC
    Try this new Energy Drink they said
    It's healthy they said
    It works! They said
    It tastes amazing they said
    ...
    ...
    I'm just gonna say I hate it because it's healthy
    Lolno
    They were wrong.
    Bastards.

  9. dragonfly26 dragonfly26
    posted a quote
    September 7, 2013 10:26pm UTC
    Am I the only one who forgot that Miley Cyrus is engaged?
    Just me?

  10. Repair Boy 🔥* Repair Boy 🔥*
    posted a quote
    September 4, 2013 8:23pm UTC
    Me *In the shower*: IMAGINE LIVING LIKE A KING SOMEDAY
    Me *Into hairbrush*: WHAT IF I CAN'T FORGET YOU? I'LL BURN your name into my THROAT. I'll be the fire that'll CATCH YOU
    Me *Running around the house*: Can we create something beautiful and DESTROY IT?!
    Me *Upside down, balancing myself on the couch*: MY LOVE FOR YOU WAS BULLETPROOF BUT YOUR THE ONE WHO SHOT ME
    This.. My friends, Is a normal day for me.

  11. mtndewhm* mtndewhm*
    posted a quote
    September 3, 2013 8:41pm UTC
    Some girls my age: Eww it's so weird but I have a crush on celebs who are like 5 years older than me!!!!!
    Me: hahahahaha
    Me: HAHAHAHAHAHA
    Me: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
    Me: Ha
    Me: *wipes tears from eyes*

  12. doggo* doggo*
    posted a quote
    September 3, 2013 1:03am UTC
    how do i tumblr

  13. dragonfly26 dragonfly26
    posted a quote
    August 31, 2013 1:02pm UTC
    Apparently pouring a little bit of water on your sister's head is frowned upon
    and is a very big no-no.

  14. mollifers123 mollifers123
    posted a quote
    August 27, 2013 8:50pm UTC
    You can post a photo of you in your bikini that's waaaayy to small and everything's dandy.
    But if anyone posts a photo in their underwear, any kind, even if it covers more than a bathing suit, it's slutty and trashy and unacceptable.

  15. mcnuggets* mcnuggets*
    posted a quote
    August 10, 2013 7:35pm UTC
    1. Do you sleep without clothing? No
    2. Do you like noodles? Sometimes.
    3. Do you enjoy drama? No...
    4. Are you a girly girl? Sort of, kind of.
    5. Small or large purses? Small
    7. Are you short? Eh.
    8. Do you like somebody? Yep.
    9. Do you care if your socks are dirty? Yeah, sometimes.
    10. Do you like Halloween? Yes!!
    11. Favorite time of year? Birthday. Presents!
    12. Where is the weirdest place you have slept? A tent inside. Yeah, I haven't slept in many weird places.
    13. Has anyone touched/smacked your butt in the past 24 hours? Haha what
    14. Is there any type of rumor going around about you? Probably not.
    15. Do you call anybody by their last name? No.
    be honest;
    1. What color is the bra that you're wearing? What.
    2. Do you prefer light or dark haired guys? I don't care
    3. Longest relationship? Never
    4. Do you have a best friend? Yeah, sorta
    5. Have you ever had your heart broken? Not really.
    6. Have you ever thought of having plastic surgery? No. Ew. Unaturalness.
    7. Do you like your life? Yes
    8. Have you ever jumped in the pool with your clothes on? Yeah. I was wearing jeans. It wasnt that fun.
    9. Do you have more friends that are girls or boys? Girls.
    10. How long have you had a facebook? I don't have one.
    11. Have you ever slapped a boy in the face? No
    12. What are your biggest fear(s)? Heights, or nature (I'm not kidding).
    13. Have you ever cried yourself to sleep? No. How the heck do you do that?
    14. Have you ever not been able to get someone off of your mind? No.
    15. Do you believe in the saying “once a cheater, always a cheater"? No. What the heck.
    16. Have you ever had a good feeling about something? Yep.
    17. Do you ever wish you were famous? Yes. I want to be a video director, or a singer but I'm terrible at singing haha
    18. Are you currently missing someone? Eh, kind of.
    19: What are you doing right now? Filling this quiz out
    which type?
    Cowboy or Gangster? Lol what
    Face or Body? Face.
    Sweet or Sexy? Sweet.
    Contacts or Glasses? Glasses. I've worn neither so...
    yourself;
    01. Eyeliner or Mascara? Eyeliner
    02. Pink or black? Mix em up, you've got what I want.
    03. Pumps or flats? Flats.
    04. Skirts or pants? Skirts
    05. Socks or leggings? Leggings, I guess
    06. Hoodies or jackets? They're like the same thing
    07. Heels or sneakers? Neither.
    08. Straight or curly hair? Curly.
    09. White or black? White
    10. Smoothies or lattes? Smoothies
    11. Diet or regular sodas? Regular
    12. Water or daiquiris? Wth is daiquiris?
    13. Pearls or diamonds? Pearls. Diamonds are fake and a tear through you heart, pearls are a natural beauty. (sorry. just felt like saying that)
    14. Mary-Kate or Ashley Olsen? They're twins. I CAN'T TELL THE DIFFERENCE.
    15. iPod or cell phone? Phone.
    16. Friends or family? Friends
    17. Lip gloss or lip stick? Lip gloss.
    18. Manicure or pedicures? Manicures. But sometimes when I'm painting my nails I get frustrated and I mentally yell 'I QUIT!'
    19. Tank tops or beaters? Beater? What's that?
    20. Big sunglasses or small? Small
    21. Sunglasses or purses?This is a strange question.
    in a Guy;
    1)Funny or Serious? Funny.
    2)Romantic or Daredevil? A bit of both.
    3)Dark Eyes or Light Eyes? I don't care
    4)Long Hair or Short Hair? Short hair.
    5)Curly Hair or Straight Hair? Straight
    6)Baseball Player or cheerleader? I don't care

  16. Raining_Sunshine Raining_Sunshine
    posted a quote
    August 7, 2013 1:33pm UTC
    Hey, it's Chrissy, I heard you just got a phone
    Yea it's awesome.
    Cool
    I even learned some tricks
    Umm, like what?
    BEHOLD: =D I AM SMILING

  17. Christopher Robin* Christopher Robin*
    posted a quote
    August 4, 2013 6:25am UTC
    I've learned that...
    If you put 10 socks in the laundry... only 9 will come out.

  18. * Sabaism * * Sabaism *
    posted a quote
    August 1, 2013 3:34am UTC
    My mum blames Obama for everything
    Like no joke
    Here's some examples from today:
    *She's reading some news*
    Mum: MINNESOTA JUST HAD THEIR FIRST GAY MARRIGE. STUPID OBAMA
    *She's making dinner*
    Mum: Out of eggs... This is all Obama's fault.
    *She's walking to go get eggs, trips on a branch and falls*
    Mum: Fu cking Obama. If he wasn't president then branches wouldn't fall from trees and trip people. This is all his fault. Thank god he can't run for president again because maybe we'll get someone good who wont make branches fall.

  19. Shanaynor Shanaynor
    posted a quote
    July 20, 2013 5:33pm UTC
    So when I was little I was on the boardwalk eating pizza when a seagull legit landed on my hand and stole it and that is why I have trust issues.

  20. Raining_Sunshine Raining_Sunshine
    posted a quote
    July 9, 2013 12:37pm UTC
    So there's this guy here to fix the A/C
    and he came into my room to check if it was working and I was on Witty so he walked in and was like, "Oh yeah, I love that website," and then walked out. I've been sitting here for the past 20 minutes just like, "What?"

:)

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