You can't force something that's not meant to be. You have to be able to let it go. If you can't do that, you've already let it too close to you. It'd break you to lose it, but you gotta let go anyways. It sends your world crashing down. Allow things close to you, just make sure it's effortless to be yourself around it, and make sure it's the same way for it. Don't force something that isn't meant to be because it will fall apart in the end.