So here it is, my soul laid out on the screen of my computer.
I hurt myself. I dig my arms up with the point of a compass I use in math. I pinch myself until I have large, ugly, purple and green bruises. I pick and bite my nails until they bleed and I'll bite my lip until my teeth almost go through.
I hate going home. My mom and I don't get along, and I try to stay out of her way. Its not that I don't come from a loving, good family, because when it comes down to it, I do. But she and I can't get along. We fight, scream and yell at each other, until I'm crying so hard I can't breathe and have no feeling left.
No one listens to me when I ask for help. My mom put me in one counseling session when she found out I was hurting myself. My counselor recommended regular appointments, but my mom never made time for me to get help. Now I'm worse off than before.
I used to be outgoing and love to talk, but I've shrunk so far into myself that the thought of speaking in front of more than a few people terrifies me and makes me sick to my stomach.
The only reason I'm still here is because I have an amazing boyfriend. He's the only person in my life who's stood by me through everything and has never gotten mad about anything I've done. He's done everything he can to help me through breakdowns and panic attacks and is the only person I can talk to about anything whenever I need someone. He is the sole reason I'm still alive and don't have to hurt myself all the time.
So Witty Girls, that's my soul, laid out on a tiny computer screen. The next time you see a girl smiling, try and look past the toothy grin and see whats really going on. Those things will hide more than you'd think.