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yourcool
posted a quote
March 10, 2013 4:35am UTC

how to break up with someone
you: your ex is attractive.
partner: which one?
you: me.
you: BYEEEE

👍 this is good · read the comments · 587 points

XTheBestDayX
posted a quote
February 23, 2013 7:46pm UTC

The funny thing is, I actually thought you
were different

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countrygirl123
posted a quote
December 5, 2012 9:55pm UTC

Showing cleavage doesn't fix your face..

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countrygirl123
posted a quote
November 25, 2012 2:48pm UTC

Your existance gives me a headache please go stand over there...
---------------------------------->

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nimmi
posted a quote
April 3, 2012 1:31pm UTC

You know that friend your parents warned you about?
The one that jumps off bridges??
Yeah, thats me, nice to meet you ;)

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 20 points

nimmi
posted a quote
April 4, 2012 12:48pm UTC

Giving up doesn't always mean you are weak
sometimes it means that you are strong enough
to let go

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nimmi
posted a quote
April 5, 2012 4:48pm UTC

Me: Dad, does my pinky look weird to you?
Dad: ......
Me: well does it?!
Dad: I don't know I don't have anything to compare it to...
Me: *holds up other hand* Doesn't it look crooked?
Dad: Its cause you're only wearing one sock
Me: ok! wait.... what?
Dad: *cracks up laughing*
Me: I'm not even wearing any socks!!

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 3 points

nimmi
posted a quote
April 13, 2012 3:28pm UTC

Cheesy Pick Up
Line #1
"Do you have a raisin?
"No...?"
"Well, how about a date?" ;)

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 10 points

nimmi
posted a quote
April 24, 2012 8:13pm UTC

♥
There is a big
difference between
loving someone
and being in love
with them.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 6 points

nimmi
posted a quote
May 14, 2012 6:58pm UTC

I'm so sick of things on Facebook that say
'Like if your against child abuse!'
WTF is liking a stupid picture or status going to accomplish? Oh, good for you, you think abusing children is bad. Aren't you just a f*cking saint? Guess what. It's just something you've been brainwashed to think.
You aren't really against it until you hear someone's inside account. Until you know what it's truly like to be abused. Its not getting spanked or being sent to the corner. It's going 7 years being malnourished and neglected. It's being stabbed, and kicked, and not fed for weeks, months, years. Its having to try to literally survive, to fight to live.
So if you really are against it, instead of liking a stupid picture or status, go out and actually try to put a stop to it. Raise money for orphanages, because child abuse doesn't always happen at home. Reach out to someone you know is being abused. Try to actually do something that makes a difference.

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BlackButterflies
posted a quote
December 10, 2012 10:15pm UTC

I HAVE SOME ADVICE FOR YOU GUYS:
TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF. I'M NOT SAYING YOU HAVE TO LOVE HOW YOU LOOK, OR BE HAPPY WITH WHO YOU ARE, BUT TREAT YOURSELF GENTLY, THE WAY YOU'D TREAT A FRIEND. BUY SOMETHING PRETTY, READ A BOOK YOU'VE BEEN WANTING TO READ. IF YOUR TIRED, GO TO BED EARLY WITH A CUP OF TEA. IF YOU'RE STRESSED, HAVE A HOT BATH. DON'T STARVE OR PURGE OR CUT OR BURN. DON'T LOOK IN THE MIRROR AS MUCH, AND IF YOU DO, SMILE AT YOUR REFLECTION. GO FOR A WALK, GO SWIMMING, MAKE BROWNIES.
LIVE.

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SeaTurtle29
posted a quote
December 10, 2012 11:29pm UTC

If I told you my secrets, you'd never look at me the same.

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iKenzie
posted a quote
November 19, 2012 8:02pm UTC

*Cute guy likes my facebook status*.
Me: He wants me.

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iKenzie
posted a quote
December 10, 2012 8:55pm UTC

Me: Can I use the bathroom?
Four grade teacher: I don't know, can you?
Me: When I said "can" I was using it's secondary modal form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought that since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. May i go to the bathroom?
I rehersed that a hundred times just to get it right in that moment. Yes I got it from the internet, and yes I really did do this in fourth grade.

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caoimhs289
posted a quote
December 8, 2012 11:14am UTC

Katniss: Wake up in the morning feeling like a tribute
Gale: Hey, what up girl?
Katniss: Grab my arrows, I'm out the door, I'm gonna hit the woods
Gale: Let's go!
Haymitch: Before we leave, brush my teeth with a bottle of Jack
Katniss: 'Cause when I leave for the Capitol, I ain't coming back
The Prep Team: I'm talking pedicure on her toes, toes
Cinna: Trying on all my clothes, clothes
Rebels: Snow blowing up our homes, homes
Johanna: Dress dropping, I hate being a tree
Johanna: Showing up some breasts to Katniss
Katniss: This is all making me a little bit tipsy
Plutarch Heavensbee: Don't stop, make it pop
The Victors: We'll blow the arena up
Katniss: Tonight I'mma fight
Peeta: 'Til we see the sun light
Wiress: TICK TOCK, this is clock!
The Victors: But the canons don't stop, no
Snow: oh oh oh, uh oh, oh oh uh oh

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yourcool
posted a quote
December 8, 2012 1:54pm UTC

i wanna steal a krispy cream truck and
go on a high speed chase because i think it'd be funny watching a buncha cops chasing a donut truck.

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yourcool
posted a quote
December 8, 2012 1:40pm UTC

things i never learned in high school:
- how to do taxes
- what taxes are
- how to vote
- what politics are
- how to write a reusme/cover letter/anything related to getting a job
- how to write a check/balance a check book
- anything to do with banking
- how to do loans for college
- how to jump start a car or other basic emergency things
- how to buy a house or a car
but boy am i f/cking glad that i know the pythagorean theorm.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 945 points

BlackButterflies
posted a quote
December 9, 2012 2:16am UTC

last christmas, i gave you my heart, but the very next day YOU STAMPED ON IT AND THEN DROVE A BUS OVER IT AND THEN PUT IT THROUGH A BLENDER SEVEN TIMES YOU STUPID MOTHERF/CKER BUT DESPITE ALL OF THAT I STILL LOVE YOU. HELP.

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13andFearless
posted a quote
November 28, 2012 3:39pm UTC

Hey babe (;
We broke up over a month ago, its over, unless you want to do other....things ;)
Oooh, what do you have in mind? (;
Illegal things...
What type of illegal things?
Kill you.
Nmq-

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BlackButterflies
posted a quote
December 1, 2012 2:11pm UTC

It's almost Christmas, so...
dashing through the snow
get the f#ck out of my way
you're so f#cking slow
how much do you weigh?
(Ha- ha- ha)
you can't f#cking sing,
I'll start a f#cking fight,
get the f#ck out of my way, you hoe
I'm driving here tonight....
oh! jingle bells, go to hell,
get the f#ck out of my way
oh what fun it is to ride over bodies everyday.
Hey!
jingle bells, go to hell.
b#tch what did I say?
move that a/ss cause you can't hide
from my motherf#cking sleigh
Hey!

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