Sugar_And_Schweiss's Favorites

pleasespeaktomyface
posted a quote
May 16, 2012 3:12pm UTC

Me: *relaxing*
Bird: *crashes into my window*
Me:
Me:
Me: God is playing Angry Birds.
Me:
Me:
Me: God thinks I'm a pig.

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BravoSierra
posted a quote
May 16, 2012 1:26pm UTC

My friend: Can I ask you for relationship advice?
Me: Sure, but you might end up single.

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WhyYouGottaBeSoMean
posted a quote
May 15, 2012 9:35pm UTC

Deep inside, you believe that someday,
You'll get a superpower.

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hailstorm37
posted a quote
May 15, 2012 8:10pm UTC

If liams afraid of spoons
I wonder how he feels about sporks..

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iluhyoux
posted a quote
May 15, 2012 8:19pm UTC

Dear Daniel Radcliffe;
No matter how many movies you play in you will always be Harry Potter.
Sincerely; Nice Try.
Credit to dearblankpleaseblank

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sarnotsav
posted a quote
May 15, 2012 8:02pm UTC

me: mom, I'm leaving.
mom: WHAT?! where are you going!?!
me: Narnia. I have been called upon for my duties as their Queen.
mom: ....have fun with that...

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 465 points

pleasespeaktomyface
posted a quote
May 16, 2012 2:50pm UTC

They should invent
a treadmill with a laptop built
in and the internet wouldn't
work unless you were actually
walking and if you wanted to
download something you had
to run and the faster you run
the faster it downloads.
I'd buy it and lose so
much weight.

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elicream988
posted a quote
May 15, 2012 9:35pm UTC

Some People Think .........A Girl's Dream Is Finding The Perfect Guy,All We Really Want Is To Eat Without Getting Fat. :')

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alimophia
posted a quote
May 15, 2012 10:13pm UTC

click to see this quote

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pleasespeaktomyface
posted a quote
May 15, 2012 10:23pm UTC

Me: Just got a 98 on my test!
nmq/nmf
Dad: Congrats honey! -.-
Me: Umm what's the awkward face mean?
nmq/n
Dad: What awkward face? That's an Asian. Because you're so smart!

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cChikk98
posted a quote
May 15, 2012 9:23pm UTC

When will Swiper
grow the balls to
actually swipe that sh*t?♥
Format by Sandrasaurus

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yourcool
posted a quote
May 15, 2012 10:22pm UTC

I wonder if unicorns were the first
to call each other dickheads.

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imayellowkangaroo
posted a quote
May 5, 2012 12:32pm UTC

Im depressed and suicidal
but everyone thinks I'm the happiest girl ever.
You know why?
Because laughter isn't the best medicine.
It's the best disguise.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 404 points