ChuckNorrisFTW's Quotes

ChuckNorrisFTW
posted a quote
June 6, 2011 1:12pm UTC

Chuck Norris Fact #40
When Chuck Norris pokes you on Facebook, you die.

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ChuckNorrisFTW
posted a quote
June 6, 2011 1:07pm UTC

Chuck Norris Fact #39
Charlie Sheen calls it 'Winning'. Winning calls it 'Chuck Norris'.

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ChuckNorrisFTW
posted a quote
June 6, 2011 12:55pm UTC

Chuck Norris Fact #38
A Handicapped parking sign does not mean that the parking space is for handicapped people; It is actually a warning to say that the spot is for Chuck Norris and you will be handicapped if you park there.

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ChuckNorrisFTW
posted a quote
June 6, 2011 12:40pm UTC

Chuck Norris Fact #37
Chuck Norris doesn't breathe, he holds air hostage.

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ChuckNorrisFTW
posted a quote
June 6, 2011 12:27pm UTC

Chuck Norris Fact #36
Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.

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ChuckNorrisFTW
posted a quote
June 6, 2011 12:22pm UTC

Chuck Norris Fact #35
Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost.

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ChuckNorrisFTW
posted a quote
June 6, 2011 12:18pm UTC

Chuck Norris Fact #34
Chuck Norris doesn't wear a watch. He decides what time it is.

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ChuckNorrisFTW
posted a quote
June 6, 2011 12:14pm UTC

Chuck Norris Fact #33
When Chuck Norris does a push-up, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.

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ChuckNorrisFTW
posted a quote
June 6, 2011 12:04pm UTC

Chuck Norris Fact #32
If you try to stab Chuck Norris, your knife will bleed.

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ChuckNorrisFTW
posted a quote
June 6, 2011 12:00pm UTC

Chuck Norris Fact #31
Chuck Norris can hear sign language.

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ChuckNorrisFTW
posted a quote
June 6, 2011 11:55am UTC

Chuck Norris Fact #30
Dragonball Z was originally "Chuck Norris Z", but it was rejected because everyone died in the first episode and couldn't be wished back.

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ChuckNorrisFTW
posted a quote
June 6, 2011 11:50am UTC

Chuck Norris Fact #29
Chuck Norris once made a statue bleed.

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ChuckNorrisFTW
posted a quote
June 6, 2011 11:45am UTC

Chuck Norris Fact #28
May 6th, 1945: A then five-year-old Chuck Norris swam the Atlantic Ocean.
The next day: The Nazis surrender...

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ChuckNorrisFTW
posted a quote
June 6, 2011 11:39am UTC

Chuck Norris Fact #27
When Chuck Norris jumps, gravity pulls a muscle.

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ChuckNorrisFTW
posted a quote
June 6, 2011 11:32am UTC

Chuck Norris Fact #26
Chuck Norris once got bitten by a rattlesnake while he was in a desert. After three days of pain and agony... The rattlesnake died.

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ChuckNorrisFTW
posted a quote
June 6, 2011 11:28am UTC

Chuck Norris Fact #25
Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.

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ChuckNorrisFTW
posted a quote
June 6, 2011 11:14am UTC

Chuck Norris Fact #24
Every night when the Boogeyman goes to sleep, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

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ChuckNorrisFTW
posted a quote
June 6, 2011 11:09am UTC

Chuck Norris Fact #23
Chuck Norris once tried to join the military. However, there are rules against weapons of mass destruction.

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ChuckNorrisFTW
posted a quote
June 6, 2011 11:04am UTC

Chuck Norris Fact #22
Chuck Norris never moves. He merely rotates the earth with his feet.

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ChuckNorrisFTW
posted a quote
June 5, 2011 12:38pm UTC

Chuck Norris Fact #21
Chuck Norris HATES copycats. *cough* Like ChuckNorrisFacts_ *cough*

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