In life you have lessons
learned. I had that the last day in February. That is the
night that i let my extremely toxic ex back in my life and ruin it
for good. Yes i could have stopped him from comiing out and
joining us at the bar but i was drunk and "i missed
him". did i really miss him or did i just miss the fact
that he was always there for me when i was crying at night or when
i felt lost in this world. that i lost myself in his eyes again, i
lost myself pride, my dignity, my everything. i was doing
fine without him in my life i am starting a new job i was house
searching and then one drunk mistake changed everything. his
smile his eyes his laugh the way he looks at you when you say
somthing stupid but in a cute way that he just automatically laughs
and brings you in to kiss your forehead and say those three stupid
words "I LOVE YOU". no you dont because if you did
i wouldnt be crying myself to sleep everynight, not sleeping
sometimes, checking my phone every 5 minutes thinking you would
text me or call me, waiting for you to drive to my house to come
pick me up and say everything is good between us, or its the fact
that i always see you on my snap and i just smile and then realize
you dont care about me. i have come to see the light at the
end of this toxic tunnel i put myself down
everytime.
i know longer have your number in my phone i no longer mourn your
hug or kiss or your smell.
i am free from you
i dont need it.
In life you have lessons learned. I had that the last day in
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Apr 11, 2020 3:53am