Here are the reasons for my "stupidity":

1. I'm afraid of guys because I've been abused and criticized by males since i was three 
2. i have never had my first dance because the boy i almost loved had to  get dared to ask me
3. I never eat lunch or breakfast because i just want to be someone people would want (skinny)
4. i don't take a shower often because when i do...i cry myself to sleep thinking of how ugly i am
5. i put bows in my hair because i feel like i can turn myself into a cute girl that actually knows how to flirt
6. i listen to sad rock music because it's the only thing that comes to me as "understanding"
7.i wear sweaters all the time to hide the cuts on my arms and wrists from cutting myself
8. i don't hug boys because i feel that if i get too close, I'll lose they're secure embrace
9. i watch anime because i want to  picture my life with someone who actually loves me 
10. i flinch every time a boy raises his hand because I'm so used to cowering when my dad would strike 
11. i hate myself because after hearing the world put me down...i started to think they were right