Day One:
10 things I want to say to 10 people.
- No matter where I go, no matter what happens in our lives, I want
you to remember that I will always be here for you. I
don't care what is going on, I'm always going to be there.
I can read you like an open book, and even though we joke so
much that we hate each other because hate is a stronger word than
love, deep deep deep inside my heart, there is a huge section just
for you, because I love you to death and back. You are the
best closest friend I could ever have, and that's because you
love me so much and I love you. I never want you to leave my
side and I hope I never have to leave yours. We will always
be a dynamic duo, no matter what we are doing because I care too
much about you to watch you fall. I can't stand when
someone hurts you or something has made you sad, it makes me want
to hurt them or kill them, because I just have always seemed to be
a sister to you and you have been a sister to me. I never
want to change who you are and our friendship because you're
one of the most amazing people I know and care about. And
that's why I know what you're parents are getting you for
Christmas and that's why I can't wait for you to open that
present because you'll know right when you get it, where
it's coming from and I only want to see that going to you
because even though I have been planning for the past two years to
give it to you, I knew your parents couldn't afford one, so
I'm letting them give it to you because I just want you to have
the best Christmas ever because you have been so worried about it
lately, and I hate to see you like that. <3
- You're a b*tch. A complete and utter b*tch. I hope
you fail this season just to see what you've done to
me.
- I love you because you're so openly gay. I love you even
more, because I was one of the first people you came out too. And I
love you even more than that, because you're always
there.
- You're one of the most inspirational people I have ever met.
I've never had someone that's been so much like a big
sister to me than you have been.
- One day he'll come up to you and realize what you've been
thinking all along. I just know he will because I've never seen
a guy like him so happy around a person like you before. Plus you
are just amazing, you never cease to do that for me.
- Before you leave for college next year, I want you to know,
you're the best friend a person could ever ask for. You're
always there and always have been there. I don't want to
face life without you because I don't think I can survive. You
know all my secrets, and are the only person who can truly read me
like an open book.
- I hope you don't go too far away for college, because if you
do, I'm screwed. I don't know how I will survive
those days when I'm really bored and we make plans. I
don't know how I will be able to sit around on weekends and
stand my nothingness. I don't know how I'll get to
see my dosages of World's Dumbest, and the random jokes we can
make from it. I will want to push more people into volcanoes
and watch Greg become Richard Simmons, and next year I'm going
to laugh at so many things that people say and no one will get it
because you won't be there.
- When you left for college two years ago, I barely knew you.
But after a year, we became best friends. You truly
have become my big brother, in every way. You are a big
reason why there have been many times where I haven't killed
myself, because I know you care about me so much. I've
never seen you care about anyone other than someone you are in a
relationship with like you do about me. I know you don't
want to come back to our hometown because you hate it so much, but
it makes me smile whenever you say you'd come back and kill
anyone who tried to mess with me. It makes me feel that
I'm loved, even if I do feel like no one cares. You give
me all my life advice and help me through every trouble. You
never reach out for help, and that always worried me. It
worried me for the past year when I saw you go through so much
hardship and trouble even though I felt that you couldn't see
just how much I actually cared for you. But that one day
at 5am when you did text me and ask me for help, I cried.
I cried happy tears because I realized that you trusted me
that much more and I love you for that and I'm so happy that
you can trust me with those things now. I've always
wanted a big brother, and that's what you have given
me.
- I hate you. I hate you with all of my broken heart. I hate what
you've done to me, and I hate the nightmares that you have
caused that haunt me everyday. I can't believe what you
did to me. I don't even know how you could ever do something
like that. You were the one person I thought I could be with
forever, but then you proved me wrong. I've hurt myself
and threatened to kill myself all over that day and all because of
you. I wish you would stop being such a self-centered,
arrogant, a**hole that suddenly started caring about what others
thought and remember the person that everyone actually LIKED... But
I guess that's never happening again, so stop trying to hurt me
with the way you act around our friends, they know what you think
is your secret of what happened that day. They know mostly all of
it. You can't cover it up, they aren't just your friends,
their my best friends too, and they care about me a lot
too.
- I don't even know where to begin. I like you. There I
started. You're the best thing that has ever happened to me.
You have helped me survive, even when I wanted to kill
myself. You have made me feel like I'm on top of the
world, even though I started off our conversations by being a
complete wreck of emotions. You've comforted me when I
was sad, and you've helped me through all the pain.
You've made jokes endless, and showed me that somewhere,
someone always cares about me. You've helped me remember
that "it" is just a stupid piece of sh*t and
that I'm way better than that. You've let me cry my
heart and eyes out to you, and still have turned my face to a smile
in the end. When Sam passed, I didn't start crying until you
came and hugged me because I knew you wouldn't care if I was
crying in front of you, even though I'm afraid to cry in front
of so many people. You've made me laugh, smile, and feel
like myself, even though nothing has seemed to go right lately.
The fact that you, unlike anyone else, would ever text me to
tell me that you get worried when I'm not happy, makes me feel
better. And that you would speak out to me and tell me that
someone may always be thinking about me, makes me feel cared about
and makes me know that I'm really not alone. And whenever
I feel like cutting myself because I'm so depressed, I think
about what you said, and how worried you would be, and how much you
care. Because honestly, no one has ever cared about me like
you do. No one has even come close to helping me be who I am
now and help me become a better person like you have over the past
few months. I'm so glad that someone like you have come
into my life and saved me like you have.
Day One: 10 things I want to say to 10 people. - No matter
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Nov 21, 2010 8:06pm
