Its kinda funny actually;
I didn't think losing you was possible, in
fact, I didn't even think about losing you.
Now im starting to realize; 'how can i lose something that I
never even had?' Maybe
that's the real question. Or maybe its 'how could I have put up
with this for so long?'
I still remember the first time I cried over you; like it was
yesterday<3 You did the
right thing now that I think about it. At least you didn't lie
and pretend you liked
me. That might have been worse. You texted me all night<3
until I felt better; and
you made me laugh; and then everything was alright again. Little
did I know that
those feeling would never go away. After several months of being
your best girl|
friend. That's when I had to learn that there was a
fine line between lover:
and
friend. Unfortunately; I had to learn the hard way. I
admit it. Making you feel bad
wasn't going to make you love me any more than a friend. I know;
It was a horrible
think that I did. I wish I could go back and change that. But I
can't. After multiple
times of explaining to you how much I love you,
nothing changed. Except that
huge change; than completely destroyed me. If
you can really call that
nothing.
We used to text 24/7. And if we weren't texting?
We were most likely having
one of our seven hourr phone
calls that we talked about EVERYTHING in. I
told you everything and you told me everything. Its funny; cuz I
thought you
cared about me. The day I believed that just
had to be true was when I
called
you; crying my eyes out. You kept saying "what's
wrong??" The way you said
my name, trying to get me to speak, was so comforting;
but not enough to get
me to stop crying. That was when that girlfriend of
yours just went too far. I
know that you really care about her; and I shouldn't have called
you to complain;
I didn't know you were going to call her; cussing her out; and
asking her what
she did to me to make me cry. I didn't think you even cared
about me. We had
out inside jokes; you told me everything was going to be okay.
And that the only
person you would care if they were crying; is me; and I
believed you. We talked
all day after that; until you cracked me up with a million
hilarious jokes. To this
day you're the only one who can make me smile that much. Its
funny; cuz that
day; i didn't know those smiles; were going to turn into
tears. We talked nights;
and nights; and nights. You ALWAYS knew and still
know how to make me
laugh. And then the time we were on the phone;
that made my heart skip a
beat. The time we were joking around; i didn't
think it would turn to be that serious.
When you said "You're not special." I said "You're
mean." Then you said "Well,
I love you so much, that i tell you the
truth." If only he knew how much
that meant; and still does mean to me. I remember all of our
inside jokes, and
all the times I made you laugh. I remember that one day. That you
called me,
but I knew something was different. You weren't laughing about
something
funny that happened, that I just had to know. You
weren't tired from hanging
out with your older brother. You weren't laughing about something
bad you did.
You were crying. About something
that happened with your dad. That's when
I saw the sensitive side of you, I knew you weren't like the
other guys. Thats one
of the reason that I loved Love you. I
tried to keep you on the phone, I was
so upset; I've never seen you that way. I almost
cried myself. I wanted to
make you feel better, like the way you did when I called you crying. I
really
wanted needed to hear your voice again. But you
insisted on calling me back; in
five minutes. I impatiently waited that five minutes, and sure
enough; you called
me back; not crying anymore. Thats when a lot changed. Everything
was awesome.
The way you looked into my eyes; with your
gorgeous; and stunning blue
eyes.
Your laugh, the way you would make me smile. Everything was
perfect. I was; and
still am deep in love. Thats
when you were over-angered from football practice. And
took the anger out, on me. We got in a fight; for the
very first time. I didn't know how
to feel. I didn't think that was even possible. Ever since then;
our friendship has been
on and off. And right now; its
off. I miss you. I miss your amazing
blue eyes. I miss
your stunning; unique; and special
personality. I miss
everything. Now, you're
totally different. You don't act the same. Sometimes; I think
you're actually trying to
hurt me. I miss the way you used to be; I miss the
way we used to be. And I miss
you. I've been trying
everything I can possibly do; to get me and you
to be
Bestfriends again. I wish I could; thats all I need.
I need you and me to be back
to the way we were; way back in the beginning. </3
I know; I know. This is SO long. But its worth reading. This
took
me
Forever.
Its the story of me; and the guy I'm
in lovee withh.
<33 ---></3
( please read, if you do; i'll lovee youu
foreeevveer(:
)
thaannksyouu. <//33.
I dont want favorites; I want comments. Pleasee? I want
opinions
advice?
(please? Advice would really help me right now.)
I would really appreciate
it if you gave me your opinions/comments/
advice.
Pleaseeeee? <///33. thaannks if you do.
<///3.
borntobblonde · 1 decade ago
0
reply
Wow it's kinda crazy how me and you have like identical stories! It's actually kind of scary how reading it made me cry because I thought of myself and I know how you feel! Listen I think we could both actually really benifit from talking to eachother... And I am completely serious. There's a few way to contact me aim xomelissa1434xo is probably the best. Facebook search me Melissa mclore or you can always talk to me on here but the first two are the best way! Stay strong!