EveryShadeOfGrey
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1 decade ago
Same -_- The real reason I started my story is because My friend pestered me into doing so. I have a vague idea of where this is going. reply
EveryShadeOfGrey
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1 decade ago
It's fine if you don't, i'm kinda having writers block so it was a rather far-fetched idea~ reply
EveryShadeOfGrey
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1 decade ago
Hmmm. . . Maybe her father could have an outburst /In private/ at the funeral, which fore shadows the devastation to come? reply
EveryShadeOfGrey
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1 decade ago
I really don't have much advice. It's excellent and intriguing, in my opinion. If anything, I might add a little bit about what happened, unless you were planning that for the next chapter/a different chapter. reply
EveryShadeOfGrey
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1 decade ago
It's very good, however, maybe you could try being a little less abrupt? The flash-back went straight into Jake's rejection, and it was a little bit sudden. But it's definitely interesting :) reply
EveryShadeOfGrey
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1 decade ago
I like it so far, but if you want some tips, I would use more detail, and possibly less dialogue. It's interesting, but I can't really see where it's going //Which is probably because its in the early stages//
Otherwise its very interesting, and a nice break from all the romance stories. reply
EveryShadeOfGrey
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1 decade ago
I have it up. Pfft it sucks right? I'm having terrible writers block and I haven't even begun :\ reply
EveryShadeOfGrey
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1 decade ago
xDD I have no idea, honestly. But I did start a story. I'm on the prologue, but it is super short. Its more of a hook then anything. I'm gonna post it. reply
EveryShadeOfGrey · 1 decade ago
Sure :)
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EveryShadeOfGrey · 1 decade ago
Your Welcome :)
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EveryShadeOfGrey · 1 decade ago
Same -_- The real reason I started my story is because My friend pestered me into doing so. I have a vague idea of where this is going.
reply
EveryShadeOfGrey · 1 decade ago
It's fine if you don't, i'm kinda having writers block so it was a rather far-fetched idea~
reply
EveryShadeOfGrey · 1 decade ago
Hmmm. . . Maybe her father could have an outburst /In private/ at the funeral, which fore shadows the devastation to come?
reply
EveryShadeOfGrey · 1 decade ago
I really don't have much advice. It's excellent and intriguing, in my opinion. If anything, I might add a little bit about what happened, unless you were planning that for the next chapter/a different chapter.
reply
EveryShadeOfGrey · 1 decade ago
It's very good, however, maybe you could try being a little less abrupt? The flash-back went straight into Jake's rejection, and it was a little bit sudden. But it's definitely interesting :)
reply
EveryShadeOfGrey · 1 decade ago
I like it so far, but if you want some tips, I would use more detail, and possibly less dialogue. It's interesting, but I can't really see where it's going //Which is probably because its in the early stages//
Otherwise its very interesting, and a nice break from all the romance stories.
reply
EveryShadeOfGrey · 1 decade ago
I have it up. Pfft it sucks right? I'm having terrible writers block and I haven't even begun :\
reply
EveryShadeOfGrey · 1 decade ago
xDD I have no idea, honestly. But I did start a story. I'm on the prologue, but it is super short. Its more of a hook then anything. I'm gonna post it.
reply