Dear best friend,
There is no easy way to say it. You've changed. Everyone in there life goes through changes, but you are not who you use to be. You escape reality in different forms, and they have also made you different. I'd spend every waking moment just wanting to talk to you because you'd always know how to make me feel better. You had made me want to better things for myself, because I saw you doing the same. Now the time has came to where you'd rather get high, then talk to me. You may get angry, you may want to ignore this...but you need to know. I trust very few people and you were the lucky one. I tried to tell you everything, but I regret telling you anything. We haven't talked in weeks, but we use to talk everyday. You started saying things and calling names that you swore you'd never tell a single soul. You get eager to push others away, then say no one has ever been there for you...We've tried. But other people have countless times have told me that you never cared. I finally realize that maybe, just maybe they were right. I know I'm not the best in advice, or helping, but I tried. I am sorry for letting you down... I am sorry that you find it hard to love me, or care. I'm not beautiful, because I don't feel it. I'm not amazing, because I'm horrible. I have relapsed once again and I finally understand. I'm sorry I made you come back after you tried walking away...I figured out by now that you are much better without me. I get that. I'm glad you are happy, even if I am not. All I wanted was for you to be happy. I never got tired of caring, you just got tired of me. I will never stop caring, and I will never stop loving you. You are my best friend, even if I'm not yours. Even if you don't need me...I should of learned the first time that you wanted to leave. I am giving you the chance to...even if I don't want you to. It is hard being happy, when the person that kept you happy is the reason you're not happy. It pains me, but I can no longer be hurt... I haven't been this hurt in a very long time.Please fix this, I need you but I don't want to hurt.
I am sorry for everything,
Worthless.
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