Maybe they knew.
Maybe
they knew about how much I loved you. It may sound crazy, but
maybe this piece-of sh;t school that i despise ever so greatly
knew the entire time how much of a problem it would be to put us
in the same places at the same time. After that Friday,
August 24, 2012 my life would never be the same. For the first
year, we were together for just barely two things. You rode my
bus, you were in my biology class. You were in my study hall
period, too, but I don't really count that because the
teachers wanted the class to be silent so the period could be
used for what it was meant for. But still, even just that was
getting too much of you. And ever since then, you took over me.
The next year, our buses were switched, to my dismay. But was I
really upset because I was no longer able to face a crazy amount
of anxiety, just to find out you were going to sit next to
another girl within 10 minutes? And the fact that sometimes, you
didn't even bother to sit with me at all. But we still had
health class every other day, and that dreaded silent study hall
where all i could do was hope you were looking my way and
thinking maybe, just maybe, we could be something more. And once
I thought I was over you, towards the end of our year you took
over me again. I probably only thought I was over you since we
haven't talked much and i've taken a slight interest in
different guys. But boy was I wrong, and I know that now. And
this time, it was stronger than ever, insane, powerful. Even more
powerful than during our young freshman days when I had no idea
what love was. Believe me when I say I've never ever felt
this way about anyone else. No one. And I believed you wanted me
too. The way you put your arm around me and paid so much
attention to only me in group settings, the way that all my peers
thought you were feeling something for me, them questioning you
and then you replying with answers that weren't
straightforward in the least, oh it makes me sick. Just to find
out you're trying to chase after another girl. And now we are
here, to this year. And how many classes do we have together?
None. Do we ride the same bus? No. I barely see you at all,
I'm lucky to see you just once in a day. And you don't
even bother to talk to me. But I guess this school knew how bad
you were for me. I guess they knew I had to stop getting my hopes
up. They knew, and they were trying to get me away. It's been
two years, and it's time that I knew and gotten myself away,
too.