lllll Harry Potter: lllll

If I was a student at Hogwarts, I'd use Howlers
to send nice messages to people. Picture this:

You're sitting there in the Great Hall eating breakfast
when an owl drops a letter in front of you.
It is red. It is smoking. Terrified, you slowly lift the seal,
cringing against the screaming that is about to ensue.

The letter rises into the air, screams, "I WANT TO
TOUCH YOUR SWEET BUTT!" and then dissolves into flames.