As the days get closer, i fall apart more and more... i went from happy, to okay, to depressed, to like not even living anymore... i don't know whats wrong with me, i cut a really lot, i cant stop crying anymore, and i think about suicide and i even have a note written... my uncle killed himself a few years back, so i mean i know how bad it would hurt my family... but i mean i don't hvae the strenght to like live! i dont even know why i don't , i just dont DX i really want to be safed, no i am not begging for attention or help, i just need to tell someone okay? i sing really depressing songs, i write horribly depressing poetry, i showed my father my cuts... they just dont see!!! my mother says nice voice! my father says wow thats a great poem, try happy next time? my parents say oh Damn Cat! They just dont see it, i want them to see it! I really want to be helped okay? i mean i really do, my life is falling apart, but who am i to complain, so many people have it so much worse than me! truth is, if i dont get better soon, there wont be a me... i just needed to say all of that okay? i doubt anyone will read it, i dont matter much i know, but i mean in case anything happens... i mean i wrote this... so uhm if you read this thank you, but i mean im sorry for venting