Reply to: FightingAgainstedAnerexia:
This is a relpy to your Anerexia message, I wanted to comment but I thought this would be better. I know exactly want you mean. I am recovering from Ana, too. I switched schools so no one knows about it here. I told them, but I guess they weren't listening. My friends are always calling themselves fat and talking about how fat they are or saying how much weight they are going to lose. It makes me want to freeak out at them. Like do you have any idea what you are saying? But instead, I usually sit there quitely or sometimes I say I'm fat, too. I mean I have more of a right to say talk about losing weight more than any of them. And they freak out calling me skinny and comparing me to themselves. Then I want to cry, ANY talk about my body is so unsettleing and I'm just trying so hard to not go through that again but its like everything its making me want to give up. Like in track, my times are slower because I'm heavier. I used to be a track star. Or in health class, we are were going over like foods and stuff. The teacher pretty much told us we were all fat and told us every trick in the book to lose weight. I messed up then. I cried for hours then lost 9 pounds in that week but I stopped myself and I'm trying not to look back. This is really long but the point is whenever I see girls calling themselves fat or telling each other weight loss tips its weird and sick but I want to prove to them that I can used those tips better than they can or I can lose more weight than they can and it is very triggering. And I want it to stop to. I know 110 isn't heavy.. but it is when it used to be 88.
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