Since everyone suggested I put this up, here's my suicide essay...
"Ugly. Fat. Loser. Worthless" There are people everyday who live their lives believing that they are the harsh names that people call them. People have philosophies that they wake up every morning no matter what. Their tragedy? That they did. The fight isn't over, people do care, and there is help.
Imagine sitting in your room by yourself thinking that no one loves you. Thinking you want to escape your nightmare although you're wide awake. Wanting to kill yourself. Think about it. You write the note. "Mom, Dad, I'm sorry. I love you. You'll be fine without me." They come home from work only to find you dead. What will your dad think? "Maybe I never payed enough attention to her and her girl problems. This is my fault." How does your mom tell your little sister, who is much too young to understand? Maybe your best friend blames herself for never noticing how truly upset you were. You never really see how many people care until it's too late for you to realize.
"I can't tell anyone. They'll ask a million questions. What if they take me to crisis? I don't want a therapist! They'll think I'm doing it for attention. No way." You think that now, but what about when you're gone? Your family wishes you had told them. They would have supported you, and been there for you. Your guidance counselor would have wanted you to tell him, he'd help you through it, step by step. There's no need to bottle it up, that's when it overflows and you lose all faith. Truth is, people want to help you. Believe it or not, a lot of people want you living, here with them. They want to try to make it better.
Everyone tells you that it will be ok, maybe not now but eventually. "No it's not! It won't get better!" You cry. It may not seem like it, because nothing's been going right lately, but you need to believe in yourself. There definitely is still hope, whether or not it's a lot or the slightest bit; it's there. You just have to look beyond the imperfections, and when you do that you will see that there are good things. You are here for an amazing reason, you are good for something, maybe you just haven't found it yet. I know, it's easier said than done, but you've got to try.
In the end, the things people say and they actions they choose to make are their decisions and opinons. They've got nothing good to say abot you because they have absolutely nothing good to say about themselves. People care. They're here to help you, because there's still strength in you. Life isn't over, you can do it. The climb is hard but the view is great.
Don't solve a temporary problem with a permanent solution.
Anyone reading this, I love you.
9yeres
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