Never been loved
part 6
"You and Sean made out! Oh my gosh! I'm so happy for you!" I told Amanda the news Friday, the night it had happened, and on Monday, she was still talking about it.
"Shh. I don't want it to be all over the school."
But really, I did. I couldn't stop thinking about that night. The feeling I got when I said his name, the sparks that ran through my body, his hands on my back, his lips touching mine, his dimples, him telling me my eyes were pretty. It had all happened so fast, and I was just as shocked and obsessed as Amanda. I hadn't seen him or talked to him since. I was probably just another girl on his makeout list. He probably wouldn't talk to me again, much less remember me. As Amanda and I walked into school, instead of Amanda getting all the attention, it was me. Boys winking, girls pointing, people whispering. I guess it had already gotten around. Amanda said, "So how does it feel to be all everyone's talking about?" I just smiled to myself because now people knew that I wasn't a prude loser. I actually put on a little makeup this morning, and wore a top that flattered my chest. I actually spent time on myself. I wonder if liking a guy makes you do that. Wait, I just admitted to myself I liked him. I like a boy. I like Sean. And maybe Sean possibly likes me back. All these thoughts were whizzing through my head, and I didn't even realize I walked right into someone. I jumped back a bit, and saw it was Brandon. The jerkiest, most perverted, most popular boy in school. He turned around, studied me, and smiled. "So you're the famous Abby, huh? Mind doing to me sometime what you did to Sean?" All of his friends laughed, and I just pushed past him, disgusted. I walked to my locker, and grabbed my books. As I was doing this, a guy slapped my a**, and a group of girls glared at me. I can't believe this. No matter who you are, once you do something, everybody notices you. I rushed to my first class as fast as I could, hoping to avoid everyone. I hadn't seen Sean all day, which I was actually thankful for. I was kinda nervous to see him. Not like he would talk to me or anything. Making out isn't as big of a deal to him, as it was to me. At lunch that day, when me and Amanda walked into the cafeteria, the first person I noticed, was of course, Sean. Funny how in a crowded room, you only see that one person you really like. It's like no one else is there, except you two. I avoided eye contact as Amanda and I walked over to our usual table. We sat down, and started talking about our plans for fall break when some redheaded girl sat down next to me.
"So I heard you kissed Sean. Is that true?"
I just looked at the sandwich in front of me, and let Amanda answer for me.
"Yeah it is. So if you would mind your own business and leave us alone, that would be great."
The girl glared at Amanda, then looked at me, then walked back to the table with all of her friends, and I heard a bunch of them crack up. I stood up, and bolted out of the lunch room. I hated all the attention. No one was surprised that Sean made out with a girl, they were surprised that girl was me. Was I that much of a loser? I ran into the girls bathroom and checked under the stalls to see if anyone was there. Coast clear. I studied myself in the mirrors. I was just a nerd. Why did he want to make out with me anyway? I'm an ugly, smart a** who only cares about getting good grades, has never had a boyfriend, only been to a few parties, not a cheerleader, and has only kissed one guy. Out of any girl he could have made out with that night, why me? All the girls seemed to love him. He could have anyone in the snap of his fingers, but he chose me. I'm so confused right now. I took long deep breaths, and prepared myself to go back out there. When I opened the door, and started to walk back towards the cafeteria, someone grabbed me from behind, and covered my mouth. I was squirming, but their grip was strong. I bit their hands and they just tightened their hands around me. They pulled me into an empty, dark janitor's closet, and locked the door. They let go, and I was about to scream, when the figure pushed me up against the wall, and was smothering their lips all over me. I tried to push them away, but they were to strong, and much bigger then me. They slipped their hand up my shirt, and started to unbutton my pants. Their hands were big, and cold, and who ever it was, they were hurting me. I was using all my might to push the person off of me, but I was no match for who ever it was. I started to cry, and prayed this person would stop. Finally, the bell rang, and people started filing out. The person let go of me, and opened the door, and blended into the crowd. I sunk down, and started crying. I was alone, scared, and so confused. Somebody must have heard me because they opened the door, and flipped the light switch. When the lights went on, Sean was standing there.
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