hazardtomyself

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Member Since: 10 Nov 2011 06:20pm

Last Seen: 7 Jan 2012 12:15am

user id: 236639

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Hello, I am Ophelia Leigh Thomas.
But friends can call me Oh, or Phee.
This is my secret Witty account...
Many people make secret accounts so friends dont know about their problems..
But this is so my friends don't know about my writing.
I once tried posting my poems on witty,'
but my friends didn't necessarily appreciate them; and began to think of me differently.
So, I stopped.
But I honestly adore writing.
So, here I am.
While I could talk about my problems, and such,
this account is not for venting, or my personal life,
thus; I shall provide you with some information about me:
-I love volleyball
-I also ride horse I do barrel racing.
-I do extremely well in school
-I have many friends..but the people who think they are my close friends aren't necessarily the ones who I would trust
-I love reading and writing
-I want to be an equestrian veterinarian
-I want to go to the University of Virginia
-I've had my heart broken, I've been lied to, used, and hurt, I don't trust anyone.
-I find it hard to open up.
-I push people away when they get close to me
-Even though I do this, all I want is to be loved.
-I have been told that am pretty, but you all can be the judge of that if I ever get brave enough to post a picture of myself with my face in it.
That is all for now, farewell my friends&foes

hazardtomyself
posted a quote
January 6, 2012 5:53pm UTC

Right There With Me
She looked at the photo album
At the woman in the white dress
"Grandma is that you?"
The little girl asks
"Yes thats me,
Oh let's see...
I believe it was May of 1953
A sunny warm day, Not a cloud in the sky
Nothing in our way."
A smile passes over her face
Her eyes gained a far-away look
Her grey hair was once black
Her eyes a rich blue, Reminising of that day
The little girl turned the next page
And said
"then is this the church?"
"Why yes..." The woman murmered
"It's the church where I was baptised
Where my daddy and momma married
Where I recieved my very first communion
Just like you will in a year."
The little girl smiled,
nodding, for her to continue
"My flowers were pink roses, and white lillies, my hair was curled,
That dress,
Oh it was so pretty.
I remember shaking as I walked down the aisle
Nearly losing it when I saw my mamma cry through her big smile
My daddy gripped my hand,
Reminding me to stand tall
I remember
Seeing him
Standing at the front of the church
Tall and strong
His big white smile
His strong hands
Washing away every doubt I had for a while."
The old woman, for a split second,
Looked a young bride again
Waiting in excited anticipation for her wedding day.
"Its grandpa isn't it?" Says the little girl
"Yes, my one love, and partner for 80 years. Through the good and bad, the birth of all our children, and the death of one. The happy and the sad
My Johnny Boy."
"Do you miss him? Now that he's...with God? In heaven? That's awfuly far away. I wish he could have stayed."
"No. Because he's never away.
He's here,
watching over me.
Every step of the way."

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hazardtomyself
posted a quote
January 6, 2012 5:34pm UTC

The Funny Thing About Love
She saw him walk through the door,
Her heart dropped right to the floor
His blue eyes, his short blonde hair
Big broad shoulders,
And a hundred watt smile
He was so gorgeous
It didn't seem fair
He saw her standing with her friends
Her deep brown hair curled at the ends
Big green eyes
A huge smile
An easy laugh that sang through the air for a while
Tall for a girl, Almost as tall as him,
And she was actually quite slim
He knew she was just a freshman;
But she was honestly kind of cute
&The funny thing about love, is that they saw eachother, but neither of them knew; That the other saw too
She dutifully attended his football game
amazed at how he played
The spiral through the air was as perfect as his game
He watched her spike the volleyball,
She was beautiful and wild
He thought he might have looked at her, maybe even smiled
He walked past her classroom just to see her face
She walked past his locker, just to see his face
Missing eachother by a minute, walking at too quick of a pace
&The funny thing about love,
They never even spoke
Both too scared, to void of hope
Sitting at home, doing her homework
She chewed the end of her pen
&said to herself
If he wanted me he would talk to me first
He doesn't know I exist
He missed anothers pass and gave up another play
Wondering why this girl
wouldn't give him the time of day
She doesn't want anything to do with me
He whispered to himself
He shook his head
Dropped the ball
And left to sit on the bench
&The funny thing about love;
they both gave up that night
too scared to try
Resigned without a fight
&neither ever knew, that the other cared too
Lost the love that could have been;
Making both think that love,
Is just a game where no one wins

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hazardtomyself
posted a quote
January 6, 2012 5:12pm UTC

D R E A M
Watching the sunset,
Feeling the wind
Wondering if she'll ever win
Graduating and packing her stuff
Into her old red pickup truck
Point the car south& just keep driving
Doens't look back on her town& She can't stop smiling
She'll follow the setting sun
Run with the moon
Write a letter to her mom,
Say she'll visit them soon
Drive past mountains
Speed past trees
Feilds of cows
Flowers and bees
Finding her own world, her own place, her own life
Far away from her old mistakes,
Old boyfriends, friends, heartbreak
and lose ends
Not knowing whats ahead,
Not looking back at whats behind
And she feels just fine
The sky ahead of her is as big as her dreams,
The sunrise, promise of a new life,
sewing her heart back together
Mending the seams.

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hazardtomyself
posted a quote
December 31, 2011 10:06am UTC

PLEASE
Check out my poems
Give some constructive critism, just read them, whatever
But if you do, I will follow you...
and love you forever :3<3

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hazardtomyself
posted a quote
December 31, 2011 10:03am UTC

Something to Smile About
The sunset; a lovely way to end an aweful day
The sunrise; a lovely promise that you have another day
A 100% on you're test; You're hardwork paid off
A sunny day after a week of rain
The first snow day
The thought that at this very moment, a baby was born with her whole life ahead of her
Getting a new puppy or kitten
Waking up to the smell of bacon or pancakes cooking
That special boy smiled at you in the hall today
The lights on the Christmas tree
Winning an argument
Watching your little sister grow up
Hearing a baby laugh for the first time
Opening presents
Watching the joy on a childs face as they open your present
Making a very sad person laugh
Good Memories; while they may sadden you, just be happy that you were lucky enough to have them
Having your favorite team win
Having a cancer patient make a full recovery
Watching a baby walk for the first time
Seeing a shooting star
The ocean
Summers
Winters
Spring
Fall
The first day of school
The last day, when you finally finish all your exams
Hugging your parents (no, you're not too old. You're never to old)
Knowing that someone, somewhere loves you
Finally saying something that you've kept bottled up for so long
Finding a picture that you painted as a child
Acheiving your goal
Eating your favorite meal
Going ice skating
Playing with your dog
Planting a garden
Waking up alive

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hazardtomyself
posted a quote
December 31, 2011 9:45am UTC

look
Open your eyes
&look at yourself
Life filled with overwhelming wealth
Priviliged, pretty, fed and warm
Kept away from any harm
Yet you still sit there,
taking your life for granted,
because you can't have everything you ever wanted.
You wake up,
upset that you lived to the next day
But think for a second,
and anyway,
maybe you'll realize that you're okay
Last night,
A young mother cries
As her new born baby dies
Starvation and malaria
Took another life
A young child in the slums,
Filled with so much hope;
Even through the drunken beatings
Of her father .
A young girl sits at the airport sobbing;
Her soldier never came home
He was left in the bloody barren desert,
along with her heart;
so alone.
And here you are;
Filled with hate;
warm and never hungry
New clothing everyday
Parents that love you;
And a sheltered place to stay.
If I were you,
I'd wake up smiling
&pray
Thank you God for letting me wake up
A L I V E & W E L L
today
© ThatsSoMeee :)

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hazardtomyself
posted a quote
December 19, 2011 10:51pm UTC

I secretly want to go to
west point and be in the military...
is that a stupid idea?

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hazardtomyself
posted a quote
November 22, 2011 8:49pm UTC

Hey if you could
can some of you please check out my poems?
maybe offer some constructive critism?
Thanks it would mean a lot!!
xoxo~Ophelia

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hazardtomyself
posted a quote
November 22, 2011 8:14pm UTC

"I'm okay"
*PLEASE READ. THIS IS FOR A FRIEND*
She chokes out a feeble
"I'm okay."
Blinks her bloody tears away.
Eventually the knocks at the door go away.
She looks at her wrists,
Bloody, but beautiful.
Looks at her stomach;
Bruised&scarred;
her visions blurry as she puts down the razor;
done for forever.
The last time she'll cut.
The deeper the better.
Falls on her bed;
weak and weary.
Cries herself to bed;
her eyes grow teary.
"I'm ok. Ok. Ok I'm fine.
So much better than
friends of mine.
Just some blood;
Just some cuts.
Just my body.
Ok. I'm ok."
Her sheets stain red;
Her eyes roll back,
her body grows limp.
"The last time I cut"
She chokes.
"The deeper the better."
She laughs.
"The last time I cut;
Oh deeper. dig. deeper. in"
Her eyes close;
her face a deathly white;
Her breath goes shallow;
The razor falls to the floor
with a clatter;
She smiled serenly;
in the bloody mess;
a murder scene it was;
even she would confess.
The last words she utter;
the last her voice was heared;
"I'm ok"
&she meant it.
*This for all of you; stay strong*
[ophelia]

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hazardtomyself
posted a quote
November 22, 2011 7:27pm UTC

She
Staring at the ceiling;
blinking away tears
from the latest disaster.
A black velvet box,
proped open on her bed;
with something shining in the light.
No ring, no neckalce, jewel or ruby,
could compare to the joy this precious metal gives her
Cold, unforgiving steel,
An edge just sharp enough;
Her drug; her pain reliever;
An arms length away on her bed
Her strength and will broke;
She bowed her head;
Brought the razor to her wrist;
ran it over her skin.
tickled by the pain;
tears ran down her face in relief.
A sick laugh bubbles from her chest;
As the razor sinks in deep;
the blood drips down her arms;
a scarlet red
she smiles in satisfaction.
&finally;
can rest
Format by Sandrasaurus

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hazardtomyself
posted a quote
November 10, 2011 8:21pm UTC

L i f e
Life,
Was too much to bear,
His love,
Wasn’t there,
Her heart was slowly breaking,
As life watched
The smile she was faking,
Slowly slip,
Down her face,
Like rain on the window,
Leaving just a trace
Of the life she had lived before,
Before she ended up
Broken on the floor.
{Ophelia}

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hazardtomyself
posted a quote
November 10, 2011 8:20pm UTC

What happened to the hopes and dreams?
They are broken, shattered at the seams.
What happened to the support and love?
It flew away like a dove.
Mend the hope,
And fix the dreams,
Sew those broken, torn seams.
Catch the support,
And find the love.
Recapture the flying dove.

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hazardtomyself
posted a quote
November 10, 2011 8:17pm UTC

Broken Angel
The broken angel
Without wings
The broken angel
Who never wins
A broken heart
A broken smile
Dead eyes
That stare for a while
The hope has long since died for
her
People have long since cried for
her
Who could love a broken angel?
Bruised beyond repair?
Afraid of the gentelest touch?
Always barely there?
Her eyes fill with tears
The blue pools that are filled with
fear
A smile that seems crooked
She watches as she hears
The joyful sounds of a happy world
All she hears are screams
The sunlight streaming past her
Yet no light to be seen
The broken angel weeps
To the world that left her bound
The broken angel weeps for a chance
to be found.
(Ophelia)

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hazardtomyself
posted a quote
November 10, 2011 8:14pm UTC

Format by XxprettixX
He
He treats me like a lady,
Calls me cutie,
Calls me baby, that's the worst of it.
I don't want this sweetness
I don't believe a word of it.
The other one,
Doesn't love me.
He pushes me away.
But the more he pushes,
The more I want to stay.
I can't take the love,
I don't deserve the pain,
When he gives me this love,
I flinch away,
When I feel this pain,
I'm here to stay.
I hurt him.
The other hurts me.
I leave him on a whim,
And would follow the other out to sea.
{Ophelia}
[hazardtomyself]
Format by XxprettixX Removal of Credit is punishable by DEATH.

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hazardtomyself
posted a quote
November 10, 2011 8:09pm UTC

You
Oh your lies,
Oh this game,
The stupid, stupid pain.
I held on,
I held on to the air,
The nothingness that you gave me,
Oh now it seems so unfair.
Your smile,
Your hair,
Your hypnotizing stare.
You were standing here,
I was over there.
I loved you
You let me fall.
You let me lose it all.
No. no I'm okay.
But why, why did it have to end this way?

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hazardtomyself
posted a quote
November 10, 2011 8:05pm UTC

Iost
Oh why,
Oh why must I cry,
Hold me close,
Listen to my lullaby,
No one cares,
I'm all alone,
My hopes and dreams,
have all flown.
Where am I going,
Where have I been?
My patience is running thin.
{Ophelia Leigh}
(hazardtomyself)

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hazardtomyself
posted a quote
November 10, 2011 8:03pm UTC

Once upon a time
Once upon a time,
she smiled,
A lovely smile she had,
Lit up her face,
Without a trace
of anything bad or sad.
Now,
The corners of her mouth lift,
But without the same effect,
Her hopes and dreams,
have all left.
(hazardtomyself)

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hazardtomyself
posted a quote
November 10, 2011 7:53pm UTC

Hey, please
check out the exerpt from my story, which doesn't have a title yet...
I have two peices from the beginning of the story...
Tell me how it is& if you'd like me to continue!
Thanks!
~Ophelia
{hazardtomyself}

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hazardtomyself
posted a quote
November 10, 2011 7:50pm UTC

[No title yet]
She veered off the sidewalk as a crash of thunder, louder than the rest, indicated that the storm was coming closer. She veered off the sidewalk and ran up a hill, through a cemetary, and to the only place that she knew would completely take her away from the rest of the world; Silvarado Ranch. She collapsed in an empty stall, and finally let herself go.
Just an idea! Comment what you think, and if I should keep going!
nmf.

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hazardtomyself
posted a quote
November 10, 2011 7:45pm UTC

[No title yet]
She ran. And ran. Regardless of the rain pounding down on her head, or the increasing difficulty to breath deeply. She ran from the school where it happened, she ran past rolling hills and supermarkets. She didn't see or notice any of this, she didn't care where she was going. She had no idea where she was going, or when she would stop running. All she could think of was what he said, and that she just needed to get away from it all.
Just an idea! Comment what you think, and if I should keep going!
nmf.

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