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darkismyonlycolour

tobefrank
posted a quote
February 24, 2013 4:30am UTC

Me: *walking along, holding laptop*
Me: *trips over concrete step*
Me: *stubs toe*
Me: *bruises knee*
Me: *breaks arm*
Me: *sprains ankle*
Me: *hits head*
Me: *drops computer*
Me: OMG MY COMPUTER'S DEAD

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 22 points

BlueEyedCutie
posted a quote
January 25, 2012 6:09pm UTC

click to see this quote

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Swag Unicorn*
posted a quote
November 8, 2012 3:52pm UTC

I just figured it out why people call themselves sociallyawkward penguins
Penguins can't break the ice.
format by br0kenwings

👍 this is good · read the comments · 1064 points

bye*
posted a quote
November 19, 2012 5:32pm UTC

i was in a hospital today and i saw this cute boy with a cast on his leg and my first thought was
hey this one can't run away

👍 this is good · read the comments · 1766 points

lovebeinghyper
posted a quote
November 29, 2012 3:14pm UTC

Mean Boys..
You can only have your
hair spiky once a week,
You can't wear the
same after shave
two days in a row,
You can only wear
shirts or polo's on
a Friday
And on Wednesday's
we wear blue.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 787 points

13andFearless
posted a quote
November 28, 2012 3:39pm UTC

Hey babe (;
We broke up over a month ago, its over, unless you want to do other....things ;)
Oooh, what do you have in mind? (;
Illegal things...
What type of illegal things?
Kill you.
Nmq-

👍 this is good · read the comments · 760 points

BlackButterflies
posted a quote
December 1, 2012 2:11pm UTC

It's almost Christmas, so...
dashing through the snow
get the f#ck out of my way
you're so f#cking slow
how much do you weigh?
(Ha- ha- ha)
you can't f#cking sing,
I'll start a f#cking fight,
get the f#ck out of my way, you hoe
I'm driving here tonight....
oh! jingle bells, go to hell,
get the f#ck out of my way
oh what fun it is to ride over bodies everyday.
Hey!
jingle bells, go to hell.
b#tch what did I say?
move that a/ss cause you can't hide
from my motherf#cking sleigh
Hey!

👍 this is good · read the comments · 1059 points

posted a quote
January 1, 1970 12:00am UTC

This quote does not exist.

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likerawrandily
posted a quote
December 5, 2012 12:03am UTC

We made eye contact for 2 seconds today.
I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 11 points

emma21
posted a quote
December 2, 2011 4:15pm UTC

did you know you can bite off yourfinger
as easily as you bite a carrot?
but your brain is like
"no! don't eat your finger!"
and that's why you can't.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 4732 points

taytayx311
posted a quote
December 26, 2011 9:27pm UTC

You text him ,he doesn't te xt
back.He was obviously so excited that you texted him that he fainted.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 5319 points

Jade672
posted a quote
December 2, 2011 7:52pm UTC

Year 2392
Child: "Mommy I can't sleep!"
Mother: "Don't worry darling. Lay down as I sing you this ancient lullaby passed down through gernerations.
Mother: " Party rock is in the house tonight. Everybody just have a good time.."

👍 this is good · read the comments · 5474 points

beachbabe7
posted a quote
October 30, 2012 3:07pm UTC

Hurricane Katrina
Let me tell you something about Sandy. We were best friends in middle school. I know, right? It's so embarrasing. I don't even...whatever. So then in eigth grade, Irene hit, and Sandy was like, weirdly jealous of her. Like, if I would rate her a 1, and then I'd rate Irene a 3, she'd be like, "Why am I rated me so low?" And I'd be like, "Why are you so obsessed with me?" So then, for my birthday party, which was an all-category 3 and up party, I was like, "Sandy, I can't invite you, because you're category 1." I mean I couldn't have a category 1 at my party. There were gonna be storms wipping out entire cities there. I mean, right? She was a CATEGORY 1. So then her mom called my mom and started yelling at her, it was so retarded. And then she dropped out of school because no one would talk to her, and she came back in October, and now I guess she's destoying the entire East Coast.
Like • Comment • 27 minutes ago

👍 this is good · read the comments · 1248 points

ilovepenguins46
posted a quote
November 3, 2012 6:48pm UTC

"Are you taking any foreign language classes this year?"
"Math."

👍 this is good · read the comments · 851 points

annalove26
posted a quote
November 3, 2012 9:33pm UTC

Person: So, what do you do for a living?
Me: Kill zombies.
Person: But zombies don't exist..
Me: Have you ever seen one?
Person: No...
Me: YOU'RE WELCOME, YOU UNGREATFUL PEASANT.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 966 points

Hale_Storm18
posted a quote
November 9, 2012 7:47pm UTC

click to see this quote

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ThatsSoMeee
posted a quote
November 9, 2012 4:28pm UTC

Do you ever
just look around at the people you have in class
and wonder what their story is?
Which ones are hiding bruises and scars
under their layers of clothing?
Which ones are covering up the cuts they made last night
with a long sleeve shirt?
Which ones are thinking about their suicide plan
to execute once they get home?
Which ones are trying desperately to hold in the tears
and get through the day?
Which ones are struggling at home
with argumentative parents?

👍 this is good · read the comments · 488 points

Maddyhj

posted a quote
October 22, 2012 6:36pm UTC

Witty is like Egypt.
Nobody understands us and
we worships cats.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 448 points

yourcool
posted a quote
October 22, 2012 5:00pm UTC

that time of year is approaching:
-scary lawn decorations
- terrifying tv programs-
people in costumes going door to door
it's election season.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 894 points

yourcool
posted a quote
October 22, 2012 5:53pm UTC

things that make me fall asleep real fast:
- when someone hums quietly.
- when my hair gets played with.
- when someone whispers a story to me.
- when someone traces my skin.
- chloroform.
#thatescalatedquickly

👍 this is good · read the comments · 887 points

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darkismyonlycolour