Witty Profiles

brillt27

1. brillt27
   posted a quote
   July 24, 2013 8:24pm UTC
   i wonder if caterpillars know they're gonna fly some day or they just start building a cocoon and are like 'why am i doing this'.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 18 points
2. brillt27
   posted a quote
   July 24, 2013 8:19pm UTC
   men don't listen because títs don't talk
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 14 points
3. brillt27
   posted a quote
   July 24, 2013 8:13pm UTC
   that sad moment when you return to your boring life after watching a brilliant film
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 7 points
4. brillt27
   posted a quote
   July 24, 2013 8:10pm UTC
   my biggest fear is falling and dying in the shower and my family finding me naked
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 10 points
5. brillt27
   posted a quote
   July 24, 2013 8:07pm UTC
   mum: so why exactly did you feel the need to throw our tv out the window?
   me: i saw a back to school ad and i panicked.
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 59 points
6. brillt27
   posted a quote
   July 24, 2013 8:02pm UTC
   "Are you as bored as I am?"
   makes sense even when you read it backwards
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 9 points
7. brillt27
   posted a quote
   July 24, 2013 7:56pm UTC
   what if extra-terrestrials think our films are real and they're just waiting for Will Smith to die before they invade
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 18 points
8. brillt27
   posted a quote
   July 24, 2013 7:53pm UTC
   yo mama so dumb she tried to minimize a 9 variable function to a sum of products with a karnaugh map instead of the Quine-McCluskey Algorithm
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 2 points
9. brillt27
   posted a quote
   July 24, 2013 7:51pm UTC
   cashier: okay that will be $237.53
   me: do you accept tears
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 4 points
10. brillt27
    posted a quote
    July 19, 2013 8:48pm UTC
    Okay, I'm sorry, where exactly did this summer go?
    Did I miss something?
    Not cool. So not cool.
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 1 point
11. brillt27
    posted a quote
    July 2, 2013 3:03pm UTC
    i thought taking off a snail's shell would make it faster
    but it just made it more sluggish
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 5 points
12. brillt27
    posted a quote
    July 1, 2013 5:42pm UTC
    I firmly believe you don't need a thigh gap to be sexy.
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 2 points
13. brillt27
    posted a quote
    July 1, 2013 10:53am UTC
    me: names child butter
    me: *accidentally brings home wrong child*
    me: i can't believe it's not butter
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 12 points
14. brillt27
    posted a quote
    July 1, 2013 10:51am UTC
    i don't smoke pot because if i did i would probably just sit around wondering why 'naked and 'baked' don't rhyme
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 2 points
15. brillt27
    posted a quote
    July 1, 2013 10:49am UTC
    slugs are obviously male snails that have been through a divorce
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 2 points
16. brillt27
    posted a quote
    June 27, 2013 10:04pm UTC
    Hello Witty Profiles.
    I am new.
    Bring me to your leader.
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 13 points

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