Like Vines - Prologue
Summary: One Direction, Larry Stylinson AU.
Harry only shows that he cares when Louis is in danger of himself. He knows it’s selfish, but Louis just wants Harry to care about him.
Warnings: Self harm, depression. I strongly suggest not reading if you could be triggered.
*
Louis stood in front of the bathroom mirror, the same as every night before. Taking in the look of the dark, feathery hair and sky blue eyes he despised with such intensity. Resenting the unattractive bags that weighed his eyes down and the disgusting crookedness of his own teeth. And, like every other night, the light didn’t fail to guide Louis’ eyes to his bare bicep.
The scars that line the skin are white and chunky. Feeling like miniature mountains to touch and unbelievably noticeable against the tan skin that a boy band member requires.
“Lou, what happened?”
NoNoNo. He’d woken up and walked right out into the family room without even thinking. Lottie had seen his left arm looking like it had been through a blender, all the way from the shoulder to the elbow simply because he hadn’t felt like sleeping in a jumper the night before. Careless.
“Louis?” Lottie asked again. “Louis, please open the door and talk to me.”
“One second! I’m getting dressed! Don’t come in!”
“Okay, I’ll wait here.”
No, she needed to go. This needed to be fake. She didn’t see anything. No.
Louis opened the door with a lie ready to escape through his teeth.
Lottie eyed his arm, now covered in a long sleeved shirt. “Lou, what happened to…”
Louis pulled the best fake smile he could, after all, he was going to major in the field of drama if he had gone to uni, he was good at pretending. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, babe.”
“Your arm had red lines on it,” Lottie lightly grabbed at his sleeve. “I saw them.”
“Stretch marks. I must’ve slept on my left side last night, no big deal. How about some breakfast? I’ll make pancakes.”
She didn’t give up. Louis spent hours trying to convince her that it was nothing, but all of his work went to waste when she pulled the shirt off with surprising force, revealing what must have been 50+ deep cuts from the night before. Lottie cupped her gaping mouth, tears welling in the blue eyes that looked so much like her brothers.
Louis brought her in for a tight embrace, there was no more hiding he could do. The young girl was mumbling things like “how?”, “why?”, “With what?” and “No.” through a waterfall of tears and choked sobs.
That’s when Louis decided he would never do it again.
Or rather, he would never let anyone find out, again.
The incident only happened a couple months ago when visiting his family on holiday, but since, Louis had healed a great deal. Jagged lines had quickly faded from an angry red, to irritated pink, to permanent white.
The weather in London was always quite cold, so no one ever questioned Louis wearing jumpers every single day, even inside. Not Liam, Niall, Zayn, or even Harry, his flatmate, had taken notice of the constant hiding Louis’ skin had been doing.
Although the cuts had gone away - well, on his arms at least - Louis’ feelings of absolute hatred towards himself had increased, if anything. If it weren’t for Harry, Louis would have had all the mirrors removed from the flat long ago. Anything to make it so that he wouldn’t have to look at himself. Louis felt sorry for anyone who had to see him on the street, or in the papers or anywhere. His face was absolute horror with repulsive features and his body was astoundingly disproportionate. The worst part of it all was photo shoots. He had to stand next to the four most desired boys in the world, and take pictures. Pictures that everyone would see. Pictures with Louis in them.
Disgusted by his own thoughts, Louis turned away from the mirror and shut off the bathroom light. He made his way towards his bedroom, the tears finally meeting the pillow they had missed all day. Blankets muffling gasped sobs, and Louis praying Harry wouldn’t hear him (although he never did). The same routine he had practiced countless nights before.
OneDirecionLikeVines