For just the rest of your life you feel like your dead. Your eyes used to have a shine, now they don’t. You used to like your body, now its just there. It doesn’t look to bad but you really could care less. You used to see the world in color, now it’s just a gray with black tint. You should care but there’s just nothing to care about anymore. You used to draw all over your papers and hand outs now it’s just the occasional star or sad face. You always have a smug look on your face and you think it’s your right to put down anyone who says anything about you. You see blobs not people. There seems like there’s no hope left and everyone tells you to keep trying but you ask why.  You think that the world hates you and that you hate it. You think that your dead but then you check your pulse and its still there, and then you think damn why can’t I be dead. You mutter the same words every morning- take me now please. You wish that every day was your last. You think that everyone’s looking at you and that they want nothing, and everything. You wish you could still have the joy you used to know, but now its just pain that never will go away. And then you wonder if it ever will, and you realize it won’t and you’ll be stuck in this state for the rest of your life.