I'm just another girl, another girl who is hiding her entire life behind a mask. :) <--- This, right here, this is a smile. How can something so beautiful be a complete and total lie? :( <--- That is a frown... How can something so ugly be the truth? That's why I hide MY ugly truth with a beautiful lie. I look like a human on the outside, but on the inside I am a monster. So full of anger, sadness, and despai. I don't want anyone to know what's inside of me; the terror, brokeness, and blackness, and yet I do. I want someone to see behind the lie. But if someone did I probably wouldn't be able to trust them, I hate how people say, "I'm here for you," when really they aren't. I hear those words and just brush it off. I mean people say that when they know sorry isn't enough. They think a lie will somehow make everything better. It doesn't. Just stick with your "I'm sorry." I know there will come a day when my smile just fades and all thay will be left is a frown. Then people will understand, or will they be just as surprised as my friends? At this point no one knows. I'm an actor and the play is my life. The challenge is to smile through the pain, act like nothing hurts you. Through divorce, emotional abuse, hearbreak, hate, and loss? Everyone who begins to care, will suddenly walk out of your life, destroying you a little more each time, or what's left of you. And of course every time you feel like giving up you can't... Simple as that... Right?? Wrong! It isn;t easy, it's te most difficult thing I have ever done. Turning this: :( into this: :) So next time you feel like judging my position on life, think again because you have... had no idea, did you? Look around... Can you imagine some of their hell's? Didn't think so. Don't judge someone until you have walked 20 miles in their shoes. 1 mile really isn't enough to see a person's whole life. Stop and think before YOU speak.