Continuing my story;
I contemplated suicide again on Wednesday. I could've done it if he wasn't there for me. He saved me that night. He saw a teacher on Thursday. He sent me a rough note about the conversation.

Him: Vicky threatened suicide last night.
Teacher: Was she serious?
Him: God yeah.

They chased me down at lunch. I don't remember much but I remember when I asked what they wanted she said "You know damn well." She took me to welfare and then to find the counsellor without taking her eyes off me. In the end we ended up in the office. She left me in the care of a sweet office lady.

I ended up seeing both the deputy principals. They called my mother. Half the staff knows about my suicidal tendencies, self harm and my mother took me to the doctors that afternoon. I scored terribly on a mental stability test.

Friday my year advisor chased me down. Yay for being the 'special' kid. And now I have to report into my deputy every morning. And I've got counsellor appointments once a week.

 I started my anti depressants this morning. So much nausea all the time. And ugh the headaches. He won't stop worrying. I won't stop worrying.

Too many things pushed me too far I guess.