poopissoamazing's Favorites

soccertrack
posted a quote
June 6, 2013 7:59pm UTC

LIFESAVERS~ in the classroom ~
The children began to identify the flavors by their colors.
Red - Cherry
Yellow - Lemon
Green - Lime
Orange - Orange
So, the teacher gave them all honeylifesavers. None of the children knew the flavor.
The teacher decided to give them a hint.
“It’s what your mother might call your father.”
One little girl looked up in horror.
Spit out her lifesaver and yelled
“OMG THEY’RE AS$H0LES”
nmq

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posted a quote
January 1, 1970 12:00am UTC

This quote does not exist.

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soccertrack
posted a quote
June 5, 2013 5:35pm UTC

Teacher:Where's your homework?
Me: Why are you so obsessed with me?

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soccertrack
posted a quote
June 5, 2013 5:39pm UTC

I want to be Witty famous so fricken bad,
Have all the followers I never had.
And every time I close my eyes,
I see my face on "People You Might Like"
A different top quote every ni-i-ight.
I swear, y'all better prepare,
For when I'm Witty famous!

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soccertrack
posted a quote
June 5, 2013 5:54pm UTC

50 degrees in the fall: Man, where's my jacket?
50 degrees in the spring: F/ck yeah, it's finally warm again!
50 degrees in Florida: Oh god, I think I'm gonna get frostbite. Where the f/ck did I put my parka? Jesus Christ, we're all gonna die a cold, icy death.

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soccertrack
posted a quote
June 6, 2013 7:12pm UTC

After Tuesday, even the calendar goes
W T F

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soccertrack
posted a quote
June 6, 2013 7:22pm UTC

My Dad said if I keep typing really loudly he's going to smash my face into the keyagfkbg43gaf56

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soccertrack
posted a quote
June 6, 2013 7:24pm UTC

Person: You're really pretty
Me: Are you making fun of me?

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soccertrack
posted a quote
June 6, 2013 7:41pm UTC

in french,
you don't really say "I miss you."
You say, "tu me manques"
which literally means,
"you are missing from me"...

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soccertrack
posted a quote
June 4, 2013 3:46pm UTC

Katniss: Wake up in the morning feeling like a tribute
Gale: Hey, what up girl?
Katniss: Grab my arrows, I'm out the door, I'm gonna hit the woods
Gale: Let's go!
Haymitch: Before we leave, brush my teeth with a bottle of Jack
Katniss: 'Cause when I leave for the Capitol, I ain't coming back
The Prep Team: I'm talking pedicure on her toes, toes
Cinna: Trying on all my clothes, clothes
Rebels: Snow blowing up our homes, homes
Johanna: Dress dropping, I hate being a tree
Johanna: Showing up some breasts to Katniss
Katniss: This is all making me a little bit tipsy
Plutarch Heavensbee: Don't stop, make it pop
The Victors: We'll blow the arena up
Katniss: Tonight I'mma fight
Peeta: 'Til we see the sun light
Wiress: TICK TOCK, this is clock!
The Victors: But the canons don't stop, no
Snow: oh oh oh, uh oh, oh oh uh oh
nmq

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soccertrack
posted a quote
June 4, 2013 7:53pm UTC

You will know song lyrics after one time hearing them. You won't know the answers on a test you studied hours for.

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soccertrack
posted a quote
June 4, 2013 7:58pm UTC

Friends are like condoms, they protect you when things get hard.

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soccertrack
posted a quote
June 1, 2013 10:35pm UTC

Me: wow i have so much work to do
Me: *goes on witty*
Me: *watches a movie*
Me: *writes a novel*
Me: *climbs a mountain*
Me: why am i not getting anything done

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soccertrack
posted a quote
June 2, 2013 8:12pm UTC

Your face is an oxy-moron. It's "pretty ugly."

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soccertrack
posted a quote
June 2, 2013 8:14pm UTC

I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure.

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soccertrack
posted a quote
June 2, 2013 8:16pm UTC

English teachers put more thought into the book than the author does.

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soccertrack
posted a quote
June 2, 2013 8:19pm UTC

"Stressed" is "desserts" spelled backwards. One usually leads to the other.

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soccertrack
posted a quote
June 2, 2013 8:23pm UTC

The Miss Universe Pageant is obviously rigged. The winner is always from Earth.

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soccertrack
posted a quote
June 2, 2013 8:44pm UTC

If the length of time a person could spend on the internet was determined by the length of time they could maintain a squatting position or wall sit, we'd all probably be a lot skinnier, or at least more social.

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soccertrack
posted a quote
June 1, 2013 9:50pm UTC

Bucket List #51
Spray a mosquito with mosquito repellent. Laugh because he will never have any friends.

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