Stupid Blonde Jokes
2 Blondes walk into a building. . . . . . . . . . . You think ONE of them would've noticed!
A ventriloquist is performing and tells a dumb blonde joke, so a blonde stands up in the audience and says "Excuse me, but you have no right to tell those jokes, they are just stereotypical and rude!" so the ventriloquist appologizes profusley, to which the blonde replies "Not you! The little man on your lap!"
A blonde walks into a library, and goes to the referance desk ands says "I'd like a big mac a large coke" and the librarian says "I'm sorry this is a library" so the blonde says in a whisper "Oh! I'd like a big mac and a large coke"!
A blonde walks into Best Buy and says to the sales associate " I would like that microwave" and the associate says "I'm sorry we dont service blondes" So the blonde gets a brunet wig and goes back and asks again and the associate turns her down again. Dumbfounded, she asks "How did you know Im a blonde" and he says "Thats not a microwave thats a TV."
A blonde is stranded on a deserted island, so she decides to swim back to shore, she gets half way and gets tired so she swims back.
There is a blonde, a brunette and a redhead that are in a game show, they are hooked up to a lie detector and if they lie they get electrocuted, if they get it right, they are sent home, free of harm. The brunette goes firts and gets asked, "who is the smartest person in the world?" The brunette asnswers "Me" and gets sent home. The redhead gets asked "Who is the prettiest girl in the world?" she answers "Me" and gets home. The blonde gets asked "what do you think about the most?" and she answers "I think-" and gets electrocuted.
A blonde decides to pain her living room, when her husband gets home he finds his wife naked, with her clothes on the floor, painting the walls. He askes her why she is doing this and she replies "The instuctions to protect carpets, you should lay down clothes!"
A blonde orders a pizza, and the attandant askes "would you like it to be cut into 6 peices or 12?" And she answers "Oh, 6 i could never eat 12!"
* no offence to any blondes out there over half of my friends are blonde!
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