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enchantedartic
posted a quote
August 3, 2012 9:49pm UTC

Did you know?
An Olympic rower stopped mid race to let a family of ducks pass. And still won.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 846 points

xlonglivex
posted a quote
July 31, 2012 9:26pm UTC

Tom Daley was bullied for being a diver as a child.
"Speedo boy"
"Diver boy"
Those were some of the many names they taunted him with.
Kids have tackled him to the floor.
They threw pens & pencils at him.
Kids had to threatened to break his legs, therefore he would be unable to dive.
I wonder what those bullies think now, watching him on the Olympics.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 963 points

BandGeeekk
posted a quote
July 30, 2012 9:38pm UTC

Every year:
Me: I wonder whos in my class??!?!
*person walks in*
Me: OHHHHH HELLLL NOOOOOOOO

👍 this is good · read the comments · 850 points

xashleyx01
posted a quote
July 29, 2012 9:30pm UTC

I tend to say "I dont know"
When I'm just too lazy to think.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 816 points

xashleyx01
posted a quote
July 29, 2012 9:10pm UTC

When I say “The other day”
It can mean any time from yesterday, to 364 days ago.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 1346 points

Brianna_Burke
posted a quote
July 27, 2012 3:39pm UTC

"Mommy! There's a monster under my bed!"
"Thats silly, there's no such thing as mo.. OH GOD ITS TEARING MY ARM OFF! Kidding. He only eats kids. Goodnight"

👍 this is good · read the comments · 747 points

Juliiiaaaxox
posted a quote
July 27, 2012 3:00pm UTC

blacklace
When people say "10 years ago"
I think about the 90's, not 2002.
nmf nmq
blacklace

👍 this is good · read the comments · 857 points

littleleftofthemiddle
posted a quote
July 23, 2012 6:53pm UTC

Dad: why are your eyes red?
Me: i smoke marajuana, dad
Dad: don't lie to me, you were crying because you have no friends

👍 this is good · read the comments · 1340 points

bailie008
posted a quote
July 23, 2012 3:24pm UTC

Female Problems #3
Getting your period before something important.
♥

👍 this is good · read the comments · 1413 points

MaddyWaddy
posted a quote
July 23, 2012 2:33pm UTC

You think
you want to die but really,
you just want to be saved.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 238 points

momentsinlife
posted a quote
July 22, 2012 7:59pm UTC

so tomorrow, it all changes.
witty will have a new up to date look.
i think the new look and features will
bring a lot of new people. i think witty
will be as popular as facebook and tumblr
one day. and if that day comes, i want to
say, thank you steve. thank you for making
witty and putting up with all our crap. thank
you for giving all of us a place to come to
when we had nowhere else to go. witty
has helped me with so much, and i know
there will be a day when i dont sign in
anymore. maybe it will be because i
dont feel like i can express myself
without people i know seeing it, or
maybe it will be because ive outgrown
this safe place of mine. but no matter
what happens, i want to say thank you.
so,
thank you, Steve.
for everything.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 896 points

MeeAndYoou
posted a quote
July 22, 2012 5:18pm UTC

Guys: Girls think period cramps are bad? Try getting kicked in the balls.
Me: Okay, I'm sorry, but you're an idiot. Number one, we could never get kicked in the balls because we can't grow them. Numero dos, period cramps are sore as sh*t. Three, even if you got kicked in the balls once a month (which you don't) the pain DOES NOT last for a week. Four, you can't bleed from between your legs for a week and live. Five, Shut the f*ck up and actually use one of your very little amount of brain cells and think before you speak, or you'll get girls on their period wanting to stab you with very pointy objects. K. Thanks. Bye.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 788 points

xXLollipopXx
posted a quote
July 22, 2012 5:18pm UTC

Who Else Remembers?
Those 5 minute episodes on Disney Channel of 'As The Bell Rings'?
♥

👍 this is good · read the comments · 1178 points

xxLonelyLoverxx
posted a quote
July 21, 2012 7:22pm UTC

At night
is when I usually overthink sh/t.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 578 points

Jade672
posted a quote
July 21, 2012 8:59pm UTC

In elementary school when someone would come up to you
& ask you, "Can I play?" and you would say, "I dunno it's not my game."

👍 this is good · read the comments · 1016 points

xxLonelyLoverxx
posted a quote
July 21, 2012 5:12pm UTC

I wish summer would get pregant
so we would have 9 months off.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 1007 points

MissyStar1965
posted a quote
July 20, 2012 6:05pm UTC

to do list:
1. Make vanilla ice cream. Put in mayo jar. Eat in public.
2. Hire two private investigators. Get them to follow each other.
3. Wear shirt that says 'Life'. Hand out lemons in a street corner.
4. Get into a crowded elevator and say ' I bet you all are wondering why I have gathered you here today'.
5. Major in philosophy. Ask people WHY they want fries with that.
6. Run into a store. Ask what year it is. When someone answers, yell 'It worked!' and run out cheering.
7. Become a doctor. Change last name to Acula.
8. Change name to Simon. Speak in 3rd person.
9. Buy a parrot. Teach the parrot to say 'Help. A evil wizard and witch turned me into a parrot!' reaptedly.
10. Follow joggers around in your car blasting 'Eye of the Tiger' for encouragement.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 902 points

ireallylovecats
posted a quote
July 19, 2012 9:29pm UTC

♚
KEEP
CALM
AND
BLAME
DINKLEBERG

👍 this is good · read the comments · 461 points

littleleftofthemiddle
posted a quote
July 20, 2012 7:28pm UTC

my friend: what if you dated a guy with the same name as you
me: what if i dated a guy

👍 this is good · read the comments · 571 points

smile_iloveyou
posted a quote
July 19, 2012 11:59pm UTC

&& Who Else...
Counts how many hours of sleep they will get if they go to bed
"right now'?

👍 this is good · read the comments · 1142 points

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