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Maddie018

  1. xerin0x xerin0x
    posted a quote
    December 25, 2012 10:56am UTC
    plot twist: santa actually brings you the naked celebrity you asked for and you have to awkwardly unwrap them in front of your entire family.

  2. Princess* Princess*
    posted a quote
    November 7, 2012 3:30pm UTC
    I HOPE MY NINTENDOG IS OK,
    I haven't fed it in 6 years

  3. Hale_Storm18 Hale_Storm18
    posted a quote
    November 2, 2012 2:26pm UTC
    Summary of 2012
    -Stop Kony
    -Honey Boo Boo
    -Olympics
    -Gangnam Syle
    -Hurricane Sandy

  4. wampler9238 wampler9238
    posted a quote
    November 11, 2012 10:28am UTC
    Demi is a brunette and has bangs
    Selena is back on Disney.
    Miley is back in the recording studio
    Justin is single
    .
    Ladie's and Gents we're back in 2009

  5. musicaddict27 musicaddict27
    posted a quote
    October 29, 2012 3:10pm UTC
    What if Gangnam Style
    is actually a giant rain dance, and we brought the hurricane on ourselves?

  6. shootingstar87 shootingstar87
    posted a quote
    October 21, 2012 3:32pm UTC
    me: can you please stop smoking?
    mom: well only if you get a quote with 500 favs. that seems like a reasonable cause to stop.

  7. lovecrazy lovecrazy
    posted a quote
    October 27, 2012 1:41pm UTC
    click to see this quote

  8. beachbabe7 beachbabe7
    posted a quote
    October 30, 2012 3:07pm UTC
    Hurricane Katrina
    Let me tell you something about Sandy. We were best friends in middle school. I know, right? It's so embarrasing. I don't even...whatever. So then in eigth grade, Irene hit, and Sandy was like, weirdly jealous of her. Like, if I would rate her a 1, and then I'd rate Irene a 3, she'd be like, "Why am I rated me so low?" And I'd be like, "Why are you so obsessed with me?" So then, for my birthday party, which was an all-category 3 and up party, I was like, "Sandy, I can't invite you, because you're category 1." I mean I couldn't have a category 1 at my party. There were gonna be storms wipping out entire cities there. I mean, right? She was a CATEGORY 1. So then her mom called my mom and started yelling at her, it was so retarded. And then she dropped out of school because no one would talk to her, and she came back in October, and now I guess she's destoying the entire East Coast.
    Like • Comment • 27 minutes ago

  9. lovecrazy lovecrazy
    posted a quote
    October 26, 2012 3:10pm UTC
    Seeing a boy younger than you,
    and thinking "Damn, you're gonna be fine." then mentally yelling at yourself for being a creep.

  10. queenmarie queenmarie
    posted a quote
    November 20, 2012 12:37am UTC
    Me every morning: can I go to bed yet


  11. posted a quote
    January 1, 1970 12:00am UTC
    This quote does not exist.

  12. lana del go away * lana del go away *
    posted a quote
    November 20, 2012 6:27pm UTC
    *in grocery store*
    mom? where'd you go?
    oh no now someone is going to see me alone and kidnap me and stuff me in their trunk and drive me to Mexico and hold me hostage for ransom and my mom wont have enough money and so he will chop me into bits and -
    oh there she is...

  13. capsized* capsized*
    posted a quote
    November 20, 2012 12:26pm UTC
    Me: exit the womb they said
    Me: life will be great they said

  14. britany* britany*
    posted a quote
    November 20, 2012 8:19pm UTC
    Friend: Glee is so stupid.
    Me:
    Brittany S. Peirce:
    Mr.Schuster:
    Santana:
    Ryder Lynn:
    Mercedes:
    Artie:
    Puck:
    Lord Tubbington:
    Cop: So, she just ran into your knife?
    Me: Yes sir, she ran into my knife, she ran into my knife 10 times.
    Stranger walking by: SHE HAD IT COMING

  15. J0s14h J0s14h
    posted a quote
    November 20, 2012 2:30pm UTC
    That moment of embarrassment
    when you aren't paying close attention
    and gracefully step off of a raised curb
    with all the elegance of a drunk cow...

  16. LacedRibbon LacedRibbon
    posted a quote
    November 20, 2012 5:04pm UTC
    What if God is playing a big game of The Sims?
    You know how you walk into a room and forget why you're in there?
    God just deleted an action.
    Mind = Blown

  17. that_girl_you_know that_girl_you_know
    posted a quote
    November 20, 2012 5:22pm UTC
    *Me at the grocery store*
    Me: oh my god its freezing outside.
    Me: holy sh/t it's so hot in this store.
    Me: *wiggles out of sweatshirt awkwardly*
    Me: holy sh/t like 10 people watched me do that
    Me: ok...imma gonna walk away now....
    Me: oh hot dayyyum sexy(; *awkward eye twitch*
    Me: oh sh/t oh sh/t he saw that walk away quickly
    Me: whered my dad go
    Me: hey, move any slower why dont you
    Me: yogurt...yogurt...dafuq is the yogurt?
    Me: oh god i know him...and her...ew are they dating?
    Me: oh my yea god they're dating
    Me: ew stop everyones watching you
    Me: omg i have no friends
    Me: HOLY F/UCK MY GRANDMA IS HERE
    Me: wait...thats a guy... oh thats awkward
    Me: oh theres that sexy guy i saw earlier...be cool, be cool!
    Me: *tries to lean back on wall slips on water on the ground*
    Me: oh my god that was so awkward
    Me: hey someone texted me
    Me: jk it was my mom :l
    Me: wait i still need the yogurt
    Me: dadd.....
    Me: whered you go? i missed you so....seems like its been forever since youve been goneee
    Me: oh there he is
    Me:*walking back to car* f/uck its raining
    Me: *hits head on car ceiling* oh my god im gonna f/ucking die
    Me: this needs to be a quote on witty...so i can have friends.

  18. wannabe wannabe
    posted a quote
    November 20, 2012 7:51pm UTC
    "No boys like me, I'm a couch potato"
    Potato=Veggie
    Veggie=Healthy
    Healthy=Skinny
    Skinny=Pretty
    Pretty=Boys like you
    Your argument is invalid.

  19. AwaySheFlew AwaySheFlew
    posted a quote
    November 19, 2012 9:47pm UTC
    My gravestone will say something on it like
    "First time outside lol"
    not mine but still ;)

  20. capsized* capsized*
    posted a quote
    November 20, 2012 12:17pm UTC
    Me: Ugly people exist to make pretty people stand out
    Me: So that's my contribution to the world
    Me: You're welcome.

:)

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